Zeta Kai's homebrew, the Oaves

I was pleasantly surprised today when I received a message from a good friend of mine, Zeta Kai.  Those of you from Order of the Stick know him for his extremely detailed and fabulous homebrew articles, which i have the honor of posting here his first one, the Oaves.  All credit goes to (Zetakai@gemail.com) and i hope you enjoy. 

There stands a large, dull-witted creature: built like a giant, but only a head or so taller than a full-grown man. The furs that it wears are caked with mud, & its leathers are just as filthy. Dragging an immense wooden club, it languidly turns its head, looking around through sparse clumps of stringy hair.

 

Oaves

Definition: Oaf

• Noun: A stupid, awkward or loutish, usually male, person
• Synonyms: idiot, moron, fool, lout, dolt, bonehead, blockhead
• Adjective: Stupid, awkward or loutish in behavior or manner
• Synonyms: obtuse, stupid, thick, dumb, dense, dull, moronic, boorish, clumsy, ungainly, awkward, graceless

 

A Day in the Life of an Oaf

Gorb wake up. It is early, sun wake up. Gorb stand up, toss off blanket. Ground is hard. Gorb back hurt from sleeping on ground. Gorb is tired.

            Gorb is hungry. Gorb leave trundle. Gorb leave swamp. Gorb walk in woods. Gorb see rabbit. Gorb sit still. Gorb wait. Rabbit hop by. Hop, hop, hop. Gorb jump up. Rabbit run. Gorb catch rabbit. Gorb eat well.

Gorb must work. Work is hard. Gorb hate work. Oaf-men don’t work. Gorb began the Toiling when Gorb was 6. Gorb now 6 twice. Gorb is tired. Gorb walk back to swamp. Back to trundle. Oom see Gorb. Oom is Watcher. Oom see everything. Oom tell Gorb to find more food. Trundle need more food. Gorb is mad. Gorb just leave woods. Work is hard.

Gorb leave trundle. Gorb leave swamp. Gorb walk in woods. Gorb find rock. Rock is big. Large as head. Gorb take rock. Gorb climb tree. Gorb wait. Gorb good at waiting.

Deer walk by. Gorb wait. Deer walk close. Gorb wait. Deer smell tree. Gorb throw rock. Hit deer head. Deer fall down. Gorb jump on deer. Gorb drag deer back to swamp. Back to trundle. Oom see Gorb. Oom like deer. Oom is happy. Oom call chief. Chief take deer. Chief is happy. Chief say Gorb is man-oaf now. Toiling is over. Gorb is happy.

Gorb eat with rest of adults. Gorb is tired. Gorb eat deer. Gorb get sleepy.

Gorb wake up. Gorb play with oaf-men. Play Rock-Toss. Gorb like Rock-Toss. Gorb good at throwing rock. Rock-Toss easy. Gorb almost win.

Oaf-men lay down. Gorb lay too. Look at sky. Sky is nice.

Oaf-men wander. Go find things. Things for trade. Humans live near. Humans need things. Humans will trade. Humans have stuff. Stuff oaf-folk like. Gorb wander too. Gorb look for things. Gorb get bored. Gorb look later.

Sky get dark. Sun lay down. Fire get made. Trundle gathers in circle. Circle around fire. Eat more deer. Tell oaf stories. Tell oaf jokes. Circle is fun.

Oom start Boasting. Gorb join in. Oom boast. Trundle like it. Chief boast. Trundle like it. Gorb stand up. Gorb make up story. Tell of oaf who work. Oaf is dumb. Oaf work hard. Oaf get crushed by rock. Rock fall. Oaf die. Trundle like it. Gorb win Boasting. Gorb is happy. Chief is happy. Chief call Gorb “Jokey.” Gorb is “Jokey” now.

Gorb is tired. Gorb hate work. Gorb get sleepy. Gorb lay down.

 

Overview

Personality

In short, oaves are dumb & lazy. Labor is anathema to the oaven way, or it would be if they knew what “anathema” meant. They are perhaps the least ambitious of the humanoid races, content to lie around relaxing while other, more motivated people work hard all day. They tend to take what they want, & flee if that taking leads to conflict. They rarely craft anything on purpose; an oaf would rather find a substandard tool than go through all the trouble to make a better one.

            The oaves are also noted for their stupidity. They are usually slow-witted, crass, boorish & dense. They seldom learn something that they don’t have to, & are even less likely to seek out new knowledge. At best, an oaf is simple yet kind, lacking refinement, but making up for it in gentleness. At worst, oaves can be obtuse & cruel, hurting others for their own convenience, without a thought of compassion.

 

Physical Description

Oaves are large, hulking creatures. They typically stand a little less than 7’ to a bit over 8’ tall & weigh between 225 to 425 pounds. The male oaf is only slightly taller than the female, although the female tends to be a little wider. Oaves usually have thick callused skin, tanned by the sun & tough from exposure to the elements. Graceless & lumbering, they have a round, portly stomach & large ungainly arms. Oaven hands & feet appear to be oversized, even for their hefty physiques.

Their face is considered rather ugly, by human standards: narrow-set eyes, large bumpy nose, sloping forehead, thick bony brow, protruding ears, large lips, & a weak chin. Their hair is coarse, greasy, & prone to growing in haphazard patches. They tend to be quite malodorous, due to their poor hygiene.

Oaves are considered adults at around 12 years old, & they age a little faster than Humans. Few oaves live longer than 80 years.

 

Relations

Derided by other races for their idiocy & indolence, oaves often don’t get along with others. They generally look down on the “labor races,” as foolish (for working so hard) & arrogant (for being so smart). They have some dealings with Humans, who are adaptable enough to accept the oaven ways, are open-minded to anyone who is willing to trade goods fairly, & admire the oaven love of leisure. Although eager merchants & traders in their own right, Dwarves simply cannot understand the indolence of the oaves, nor do they want to. The Elves appreciate the oaves’ free-spirited demeanor & self-sufficient culture (such as it is), but have a hard time looking past the loutish behavior & dull wit of an oaf. Gnomes are frequently amused by their gullibility, falling for classic pranks over & over again. Halflings typically enjoy the company of oaves, both for their value of simple contentment & their larcenous tendencies. Half-Elves empathize with the oaves, due to their lack of a place in civilized society & their untapped potential; however, even a Half-Elf’s talent for diplomacy can only go so far up against the dimness of an oaf. Half-Orcs often find themselves directly competing with oaves for territory, & therefore they rarely make friends.

 

Alignment

Laws have little place in oaven society. Oaves are too lethargic & too dumb to make much use of lawfulness. Chaotic to a fault, as a group they favor neither good nor evil. Those that lean toward good will forage, scavenge or trade for whatever they need, & try to “go with the flow” of those around them. Those that lean toward evil will steal from, intimidate or enslave others to accomplish their simple goals.

 

Oaf Lands

Oaves live in places that no civilized people would inhabit: remote valleys, rugged badlands, fetid swamps, & dank caves. This puts them in opposition with orcs, goblinoids, giants, lizardfolk, & trolls. Since oaves tend to view combat as laborious, they will often migrate from an area that has become unpleasant, resettling in a new land that has better prospects & lesser competition. This practice makes oaves perpetual refugees, moving from place to place in a nomadic hunt for fertile land, easy game & affable neighbors.

Oaven settlements are loosely organized communities, known as trundles, which are typically slapdash & jumbled, ruled by the strongest & governed by whim. The inhabitants are simply too slothful to argue, they go along, as long as they aren’t forced to work. They tend to live in poverty & squalor, but are too languid to do anything to improve their lot.

 

Religion

Contrary to what most people think, the oaves not only have a god, but an entire pantheon of deities. These gods, however, are not worshipped piously or with much enthusiasm. The oaves are torpid after all, & are not prone to devote themselves to the rigors of religious life. Those that do even think about piety usually venerate the creator of the oaves, Ofo. Oaves are also known to follow Gulu, the God of Ease, & Rozo, the Goddess of Theft. There are a few other gods in the oaven pantheon, but they are seldom worshipped exclusively, & like all oaven gods, they are rarely (if ever) worshipped passionately.

 

Language

The Oavish language is a simple, guttural tongue that uses the Dwarven runic script on the very few occasions when it is actually written. Nearly all of its words are monosyllabic, & a good portion of the tongue uses body language in its syntax. This speech is virtually useless for communicating complex topics, such as science, engineering, philosophy, medicine, or even history. It really only lends itself well to topics concerning leisure: games, sleeping, play, relaxation & other idleness.

 

Male Names

Tharg, Torp, Nak, Zaj, Faz, Gorb, Bruth, Sharl, Arz, Grol, Wog

 

Female Names

Fush, Leb, Voch, Oom, Sheel, Hech, Gree, Urch, Skun, Dev, Spuk

 

Adventurers

Oaves are stupid, sedentary beings, not usually well-suited to the life of an adventurer. The curiosity, ambition & wit required to be an explorer or mercenary is rarely present in a typical oaf. A rare minority, however, does find the life of an adventurer appealing, & searches for exciting activities. These oaves are nearly always exiles from their respective trundles, cast out because they “make the others look bad.” Although adventurers have a lot to offer the generally-inactive oaves, the vast differences in viewpoint leave little in common. Without the support of the other oaves, these lone travelers often seek out adventurers of other races to compliment their abilities.

 

Racial Traits

• +4 Strength, -2 Dexterity, +2 Constitution, -4 Intelligence: Oaves are hulking & tough, but they are also dim-witted & clumsy.
• Oaf base land speed is 30’.
• Medium Size: As Medium creatures, oaves have no special bonuses or penalties due to their size. However, see the powerful build ability description below for more details.
• Monstrous Humanoid: As monstrous humanoids, oaves are proficient with all simple weapons, but they have no proficiency with any armor or shield. They also have 8-sided Hit Dice, a base attack bonus equal to their total Hit Dice (like a fighter), good Reflex & Will saves, & skill points equal to (2 + their Intelligence modifier, minimum 1) per Hit Die, with quadruple skill points for the first Hit Die.
• Human Sight: Unlike other monstrous humanoids, oaves lack darkvision, or even low-light vision. Instead, they have the same visual acuity as humans (which is to say, not much), & receive no special bonuses based on innate enhanced vision.
• Powerful Build: The physical stature of an oaf lets him function in many ways as if he were one size category larger. Whenever an oaf is subject to a size modifier or special size modifier for an opposed check (such as during grapple checks, bull rush attempts, & trip attempts), the oaf is treated as one size larger if doing so is advantageous to him. An oaf is also considered to be one size larger when determining whether a creature’s special attacks based on size (such as improved grab or swallow whole) can affect him. An oaf can use weapons designed for a creature one size larger without penalty. However, his space & reach remain those of a creature of his actual size. The benefits of this racial trait stack with the effects of powers, abilities, & spells that change the subject’s size category.
• Illiteracy: Oaves do not normally learn to read. Their culture deemphasizes education, & they have strictly oral histories & storytelling traditions. Therefore, oaf characters are by default illiterate. They must spend 2 skill points to gain the ability to read & write any language that they are able to speak.
• +2 racial bonus to Survival checks: Oaves have becoming quite adept at living off the land, especially in the easiest manner possible.
• -2 racial penalty to Hide & Move Silently checks: Oaves are naturally clumsy, & are quite inept at being stealthy.
• +2 racial bonus to resist poison & disease: Oaves are naturally tough, & have become accustomed to squalid conditions, giving them a natural resistance to infection.
• +2 racial bonus to thrown weapons: Oaves have become quite adept at throwing objects, & can use them to attack with surprising accuracy.
• Automatic Language: Oavish
• Bonus Languages: Common, Giant, Dwarven, Troll
• Favored Class: Barbarian. A multi-classing oaf’s barbarian class does not count when determining whether he takes an experience point penalty (see the XP for Multi-class Characters section, page 60 of the Player’s Handbook). The simple, indolent, largely illiterate life of the oaves produces many barbarians.
• Level Adjustment: +2
• Base Height, Male: 6’6”
• Base Height, Female: 6’4”
• Height Modifier: +2d10
• Base Weight, Male: 200 lbs
• Base Weight, Female: 225 lbs
• Weight Modifier: ×(1d10) lbs
• Adult = 12 years old
• Middle Age = 25 years old
• Old = 37 years old
• Venerable = 50 years old
• Maximum Age = Venerable + 2d20 (52-90 years old)
• Starting Age (Barbarian, Rogue & Sorcerer) = Adult + 1d4
• Starting Age (Bard, Fighter, Paladin & Ranger) = Adult + 1d6
• Starting Age (Cleric, Druid, Monk & Wizard) = Adult + 2d6

 

Psychology

Outlook

A simple life of leisure & plenty is everything in the mind of an oaf. Lazy & dumb, oaves will avoid excess work at all costs. They will forage, scavenge, trade, bully & steal to get what they want or need. Some evil oaves have even been known to capture slaves to work for them. Most oaves, however, will simply do without something rather than force someone else to do it. They are often, after all, too lazy to capture & enslave people.

            Oaves typically reinforce each other’s laziness, discouraging those who would work hard at anything. This includes thought, adding to the ignorance & dull wit of the average oaf. Particularly industrious or inquisitive oaves can find themselves cast out of oaven society, branded exiles for their denial of the oaven way.

            Oaves are also infamous for their stupidity. They are only wise concerning survival & not working, applying their meager wits toward finding easier ways to do things, without expending any extra effort. Most are thick-headed in the extreme, making even orcs, trolls, giants, & goblinoids look wise by comparison.

 

Clothing

Oaves do not make the most of their paltry possessions. They generally trade goods that they found or stole for things that they need, so most of their clothing was designed by & for other races. This fact, combined with their insistence on quantity over quality, means that their clothing often is of poor make & even worse fit, tight in some areas while overly loose in others.

            Oaves prefer leathers & furs over woven cloth fabrics. They like their clothing to be simple, tough, & versatile. Once they find garments that they are fond of, they usually wear them until the articles are well past worn. Their clothes are rarely anywhere close to clean, & in fact are usually caked in filth, due to the slovenly habits of the oaves.

            Oaves seldom wear jewelry, for a number of reasons. Ornamentations of other races do not usually fit their oddly-shaped bodies very well. Also, they hardly ever find jewelry of any sort during their foraging. Lastly, most oaves find that jewelry accentuates their otherwise disheveled appearance. Only simple rings, bracelets, & necklaces made of base or semiprecious metals appeal to oaven aesthetics.

 

Grooming

Oaves, as a rule, do not truly groom themselves in any meaningful way. They care only a little about their appearance, & are usually too lethargic to do anything about it. Bathing is only done when necessary or convenient, so they are often scruffy & dirty. Their patchy hair is nearly always greasy or tangled. Their skin is grimy, their nails are cracked, their teeth are stained, & their breath is putrid. They typically smell quite rank, & are too dumb to notice that this affects their relations with others.

 

Oaf Life

Leisure

Oaves favor relaxation to work with an almost religious zeal. They can easily lie around, doing little if anything, for days at a time. Extremely slothful, they are greatly averse to working hard, even to their own personal benefit. Unsurprisingly, this lack of motivation leads most of the oaves to live gluttonous lives of apathy. They enjoy their free time to a great extent, & will fight to protect it. They like games, sleeping, playtime, rest & all other manner of idleness. No form of recreation is unknown to them, & they revel in them all.

            Few things can provoke them to act, but one activity that can prompt them is the Fire Circle. Every evening, all of the oaves in a trundle gather around a cooking fire after dinner, & for the rest of the night, they all tell each other stories. They recite myths, legends, tall tales, boasts, jokes & local folklore until the last oaf has retired to sleep. This practice is a strong tradition among the oaves, & for good reason. Young oaves gain most of their knowledge of the oaven way of life by listening to their elders tell the oaven sagas. Anecdotes & cautionary tales are often told in the circle, for the wise to learn from (though they only occasionally do). The bragging of past accomplishments in such stories has even led to the rise of Boasting as a competitive sport among the oaves. No yarn is excluded from the circle, & everyone can speak. The only rules are: do not interrupt another’s account, speak so that all may hear, & do not tell the same story twice in one night. In the chaotic realm of the oaves, however, even these few rules are regularly bent or broken.

 

Oaf Games

As creatures of leisure, oaves play games of all types. They pretend that they are knights & princesses, they wrestle, they search for hidden stones, they do guessing games, & any other diversion that one can imagine. As oaves, though, certain games appeal to their simple, lazy nature so strongly that they are nearly universal among oaven communities.

Trundling

A simple, easy sport for a simple people who love ease, trundling is merely a rolling race, where the objects to be rolled are the players themselves. Players gather at the top of a small, smooth-sided hill (one of the few occasions where a group of oaves can be convinced to climb a hill). Once they are lined up, they yell out “One! Two! Go!” (Oaves can seldom count past 2). They then drop to the ground, curl up in a ball & roll down the hill. Whoever rolls the farthest is declared the winner. Player must remain curled until they come to a full stop. This is the most popular sport in oaven life, & trundling tournaments between settlements are common. There are also many variations; one of the most widespread variants calls for a line to be drawn across the path at the bottom of the hill. Whoever rolls over the finish line first wins.

Participating in Trundling

Being a Trundler usually requires a heavy, round shape, not unlike a sumo wrestler (see below for more information regarding the Trundler prestige class). Players must make a Tumble check (DC15 for smooth hills, DC20 for rough hills, DC25 for rugged hills, DC30 for rocky hills) to make it down the hill without getting caught up in an obstacle, losing momentum. The distance one travels is the player’s weight + (1d8 × 50). Note that the distance is not given in feet or any other increment, as this would require knowing the height of the hill, as well as other factors; with the average small hill that would be suitable for trundling, this figure could be given in yards or meters. This distance is merely an abstract value that can be easily compared to the other players. Winning a game of Trundling is a challenge equal to the combined CR’s of the losing players, & earns the winner experience points equal to a battle of a corresponding CR, but only if success in the game is somehow relevant to the adventure as a whole.

Boasting

In a culture that values a tall tale well told, some oaves tell taller tales than the rest. This has led to a competitive storytelling game known as Boasting. In the evening, at the Fire Circle, players gather with the rest of the trundle & try to out-do one another with the most outlandish, best-told story. The audience is the judge at these contests; it is their favor the players are seeking, not their rivals. Some stories are considered bad form, however. Tales involving another opponent, their family, or the friends are likely to provoke a violent reaction from that oaf, regardless of context. Likewise, stories that are true are also discouraged as bad form in this game, the reasoning being that a true story is unoriginal & that “anyone could tell it.”

Participating in Boasting

The players take turns telling their stories. They are each judged by the audience, & the person who tells the best story wins. Telling a good story calls for a Diplomacy check (DC15) to try & get the audience on one’s side. Then the story itself requires a Bluff check (DC20, +5 for an Unfriendly audience, +10 for a Hostile audience, -5 for an Friendly audience, -10 for a Helpful audience) to see if the crowd likes it or believes it. In the case of multiple players succeeding, the player who beats the Bluff check by the biggest margin is considered the winner. Participants who win a Boasting match earn experience points equal to the CR’s of the two toughest opponents, but only if that game was relevant to the current adventure.

Rock-Toss

The game of Rock-Toss is not an original oaven invention. It was learned (with some difficulty) from the giants. Giants have been hurling stones, both in battle & for sport, since before recorded history. The rules are simple; each player stands in a small circle (5’ diameter). They then throw five (5) stones at a target a set distance away (usually 30’ from the player’s circle), which can be a tree stump, a boulder, or even a criminal to be executed. The player that gets one of their stones closest to the target is the winner.

Participating in Rock-Toss

Taking part in a game of Rock-Toss requires the Stone’s Throw feat (see Feats, below). Throwing a stone is a ranged touch attack, with the target’s AC being 15. The goal is to actually miss the target directly. Players aim for a point adjacent to the target, choosing a spot along the cardinal directions (1 foot south, 2 feet northwest, etc). They then roll a ranged attack. Hitting the intended spot causes their stone to bounce, landing 1d4’ away in the same direction as the throw. Missing the intended spot causes their stone to hit a spot 1d6’ away from the intended spot, in a random direction (roll 1d8 for course). This will also cause a bounce, landing 1d4’ away in the same direction as the throw, unless it hits the actual target. Hitting the target directly causes a stone to bounce 1d6’ away from it, in a random direction (roll 1d8 for course). Hitting the target with a bounce causes a stone to bounce again, this time landing 2d12” from the target. In the case of a tie, the tied players throw another stone, & the closest one is declared the victor. If that game was pertinent to the ongoing adventure, then the participant who won at Rock-Toss match earns experience points equal to the CR of the toughest opponent.

 

Food

The oaven diet is a widely varied lot, consisting mainly of whatever an oaf can trade for, find, or take. They favor meat to other provisions, but will eat fruits, berries, grasses, leaves, roots, & other vegetables. They will also settle for mushrooms, algae, moss & lichens. Of the meats that they will eat, they prefer mammalian flesh to other kinds, but again, reptiles, birds, fish, amphibians, insects & even grubs will suffice. Other races may find fault with many oaven habits, but their lack of pickiness is often admired, albeit begrudgingly.

            As with all aspects of oaven life, laziness governs the diet of the oaves. If game is abundant, then an oaf will hunt or fish. If beasts are scarce, then they will scavenge for carrion. If plants are plentiful, then an oaf will gather up the excess. If flora is scant, then they will forage for bugs, roots, & fungi. No matter what, an oaf will favor whatever food is easiest to find, procure & eat.

            Because of the slipshod nature of the oaven diet, they have extremely resilient stomachs, as well as a resistance to poison & disease. They often eat things that even barbarians of other races find repulsive.

 

Youth & Education

It may surprise those who don’t know much of oaven culture, but oaves do care for their children, to a certain extent. When oaves are born, their mother will nurse them for the first couple of years of life, until their teeth grow in & they can eat solid food. Then the young oaf child is passed into the care of another family in the same trundle, while the parents recuperate from the burden. The child will then stay with a family for a few months, maybe even a year or so, before being placed with yet another oaf family in the same trundle. This practice ensures that trundles are tightly-knit communities, despite their squalor & chaos.

            Once the child is old enough to care for themselves (seen by most oaves as about 6 years old or so), the child begins the Toiling. Adults no longer care for the child. Nobody offers food, assistance, or shelter. A toiling child is given chores by the adults, usually difficult ones that involve a lot of physical labor. They are forced to hunt live game, to provide the trundle with meat. They are told to build their own shelter, & repair those of others. Only at night, when sitting around with the others in the Fire Circle listening to the oaven myths & legends, are oaven children treated like other oaves. All of this contributes to the mindset of the oaf: one who equates work with seclusion, suffering, & deprivation; one who believes that everything that they ever needed to know can be learned in the Fire Circle; and one should do what one’s elders say, not as they do.

The Toiling goes on until the child reaches maturity (at about the age of 12), when the oaf is considered an adult, of equal rank to the other oaves. By then, the oaf usually hates work of all kinds & wants nothing more than to get the most out of life, while doing the least to earn it.

 

Arts & Crafts

Oaves are not generally crafty people, in any sense of the word. Crafting objects of practical & aesthetic value requires a certain diligence & creativity that the oaves do not possess in abundance. It is not that the oaves cannot see beauty; it is more of an issue of their dull-witted lassitude getting in the way of actually making it. That said, more than a few oaves have overcome their nature & produced works of appreciable usefulness & appeal.

            They often work with wood & earth, as stone & metal are too difficult to easily manipulate. Oaven tend to take wood pieces that they find (or can easily rend from trees), lash them together with vines or twine to form a frame, & cake the frame with mud for a rudimentary sculpture. An oaf’s art may be simple & crude, yet their finer works demonstrate the best of what makes oaves appealing: their tenderness & quiet strength. Naturally, this form of creation is looked down upon by most other oaves as embarrassing & wasteful.

            If the oaves excel at any craft, it would be trading. Not willing to work for the supplies necessary to sustain their lives, they are skilled hagglers, despite their poor intelligence. They have a canny knack for bargaining, always trying to get the most for their offer. Their disregard for the quality of the items that they are trading for combined with their simple, humble demeanor, means that they often succeed.

 

Technology & Magic

Technology is alien to the oaven mindset. Despite the obvious work-reducing benefits that technology can offer, most machines (not to mention the physical concepts that they are based on) are simply over the heads of oaves. They use only the simplest of tools: wedges, inclined planes & the like. Even basic pulley use is not widespread in oaven society. Oaves might be lucky enough to get their hands on the occasional elven, dwarven or gnomish device, but without the expertise necessary to operate one properly, these gadgets tend to break swiftly, further undermining the oaven opinion of technology.

            One avenue of labor reduction has proven fruitful though: magic. Adepts are common among the oaves; bards & sorcerers are not rare either. Even druids, rangers & clerics have their place in oaven society. The only spellcasters that are atypical are wizards. Although oaves rarely have the discipline for higher-level sorcery, low-level magic is a simple & efficient way to accomplish tasks without expending much effort.

 

Love

To the oaf, love should be like everything else in oaven life: convenient & simple. Oaves, as a rule, do not have organized ceremonies or rituals of any sort, so formal marriage as one would generally know it is unheard of. Announcements of bonding are common though.

When two oaves decide that they wish to be together for the foreseeable future, they announce to the rest of the trundle that they are now bonded. Their relationship is, at least for now, official & exclusive. This type of matrimony is still somewhat casual, however. Marriages can & do get dissolved by either party, for any reason, which happens rather frequently. Oaves have no compunction to re-bonding with another person in the trundle, so the average oaf will be bonded to several spouses in their lifetime.

            Unions among oaves are often issues of convenience. If a bonding would satisfy a mating urge, or make shelter upkeep easier, or provide companionship, then it is arranged with a compatible oaf who agrees, approval is sought from the trundle’s chief, & an announcement is made, as simple as that. This is not to say that love between partners is an unusual thing; it simply means that love isn’t strictly necessary in their minds. According to the oaves, love is something that one grows into over time. Oaves bond first, & then learn to love their spouse later. Inter-trundle marriages are arranged by the chiefs of the two communities, often without the intended partners even meeting each other first.

            Children of the oaves grow quickly. Gestation is only 6 months, & they learn to walk in their first year. Talking takes a bit longer; most oaves are mute until they are about 4 years old or so. Both parents care for the child, as the mother demands that the father help lighten her burden. Males usually find that it is easier to help than to anger an oaven mother.

            Infant mortality is somewhat high, due to the foul conditions of most oaven settlements. A certain Darwinian attitude is generally taken in the oaven culture concerning this fact. Children that survive are cherished & praised as good strong additions to the community; offspring that perish are quickly forgotten about, thought of as weak if thought of at all.

 

Oaves at War

Fighting is typically judged to be too much work, so war is usually avoided if possible. Although they will fight if forced to, oaves would generally view fleeing an area under attack to be easier & safer. Shelters can be remade, items can be replaced, & trundles can be relocated. Oaves don’t often have many possessions in the first place, so defending them in combat is seen as foolish & a waste of effort.

            There are a few situations in which widespread combat can occur. First & foremost, if they are forced to defend their very lives, then they will fight boldly & mercilessly. They may be idle & unintelligent, but they still have a strong will to live, like any other race. Second, wiser oaves that lean towards good will fight to defend a nearby community of another race, on the well-founded assumption that in return, they may be compensated later for their trouble with goods & services. Lastly, oaves of an evil bent will sometimes capture & enslave people of other races, forcing them to work for the oaves. This rarely ends well, even for the oaves, as their lack of intellect will often cause them to neglect or forget about their prisoners until they later return & find torn ropes or a bound corpse.

            Oaves are partial to wooden clubs, maces & staves in battle, mostly made from scavenged branches & young tree trunks. They favor bludgeoning weapons to slashing or piercing types in nearly every situation, preferring to bash & batter their foes into submission. Thrown rocks are also common, & oaves can hurl heavy stones with deadly precision. Armor & shields are rarely if ever used; most armor plate is made for other races & fits them poorly & good strong shields are hard to come by in the oaven world.

 

Death

Casualties are a common occurrence in oaven life. Despite their tough, strong bodies & resistance to poisoning or disease, oaves are clumsy & foolish, which can be a dangerous combination. Oaves can be prone to getting in over their heads, & they are just as susceptible to injury & death any other race.

            When death occurs among the oaves, they are usually pragmatic & unsentimental about it. Although they do care about their families & friends a great deal, they know that such things happen, that there is nothing that they do to change things, & that death happens far too frequently to get worked up over it.

            After an oaf dies, their body is rarely well cared for. Only the most minimal effort is taken to prepare the cadaver, & the possessions of the deceased (if any) are stripped from the remains & given to others in the community. Often the corpse is merely dragged away from the trundle to an area that is both nearby & mostly unused, where it can decompose quickly. No effort is made to inter or preserve it; the body is just dumped & forgotten about. If an oaf were to expire while on a journey for some reason, then the other oaves would more than likely just leave the corpses where they lie, or at most, roll the cadaver over to the side of the road. The remains of oaves are a common sight in oaven lands, reaffirming their reputation among other races as a brutal, callous people.

 

Law & Justice

Stringent adherence to the law is not part of the oaven way, & neither is the drafting nor the enforcing of laws. Laws are restrictive & confining. They require effort to remember & obey. Therefore, most trundles are fairly lawless communities; most oaves are content to do as they please, without rules & regulations governing their behavior.

            This is not to say that every trundle is in a state of pure anarchy. Each trundle is presided over by a chief. The trundle’s chief is responsible for directing the settlement’s actions as a group. The chief judges when it is time to move the trundle to a better location, tells oaven children when it is time for them to begin & end the Toiling, supervises games & contests, grants permission for couples to bond, & appoints the Watchers, as well as a successor to the position of chief.

There are few official crimes in oaven lands, as there are few official laws. Most regulations are simple & obvious, like the oaves themselves. Killing other oaves is usually bad, as is the murder of other races. Working hard is a crime, as is forcing other oaves to work (slavery of other races is generally permitted, however). For oaven children, avoiding the Toiling is a crime, & so is disobeying an adult, especially when ordering a child to work.

Most crimes are punishable by beatings, administered by either the chief or one of his watchers. Other times, an oaf may find themselves forced to repeat the Toiling for a while, until they “learn their lesson.” If the crime is more severe, or the crime is repeated several times by the same oaf & beatings or Toiling are not effective as a deterrent, then the offending oaf is exiled, banished from the trundle for a set time, sometimes forever. Only on very rare occasions is a crime so heinous as to be punishable by death. Executions are usually performed by trying the criminal to a post & using them as the target in Rock-Toss games until they have been stoned to death, or die of thirst & starvation. If an easier method can be found to put the criminal to death, however, it will most likely be used instead.

 

Oaf Society & Culture

The oaves are a people of bound by proven traditions. The do not readily use lateral thinking (in fact some non-oaves say that they do very little thinking at all), & they are not prone to introspection. They rely on the wisdom of their ancestors (such as it was), as told by the elders in the Fire Circle. They have simple-yet-effective tactics to deal with what life throws at them, & they’ve adapted to live the life that they want without being more than a mild nuisance to most of their neighbors.

            Oaves are not known to gather in large communities. Small villages, known as trundles, make up the vast majority of oaven settlements. Only a few actual oaf cities have ever existed, & most of these have eventually collapsed into chaos.

            People of other races often wonder why oaves gather into group at all. They are usually too slothful to go to all the effort it takes to form a community, even one as slipshod as one made by oaves, so why bother? The answer lies (ironically enough) in their relative self-sufficiency. Oaves can pretty much take care of themselves, being strong, tough, & vigorous. However their laziness causes them to do as little as possible. This is often reconciled in this manner: an oaf who is good at something, like scavenging or bird-catching, does it efficiently. If they focus on their trade, they can do it easily, quickly generating an excess. They can then offer other oaves a trade, exchanging their goods for another’s, thereby ensuring that neither oaf needs to work hard to get both wares. The fisher who can easily catch a lot of fish can trade some of his catch for the fruit-picker’s berries, benefiting both of them.

 

Trundles

            Most oaves lives in small villages & thorps, which are called trundles. The name comes from an oaven legend, which states that long ago, a group of nomadic oaves were wandering through the wilderness, when they came upon a lush fertile valley down below them. The chief of these oaves slipped, fell, & rolled down the hill into the valley. The rest of the oaves, bewildered but obedient, followed their chief’s example, & rolled down the hill after him. They stayed in that valley from then on, becoming the first permanent settlement.

            Trundles usually contain, on average, between 20-80 oaves, with some communities of only a dozen or so & almost no villages with a population of more that 400. A majority of trundles are slapdash, jumbled communities, with little if any organization or order. Chaotic, lazy & dumb, the oaves have neither the predilection, the drive, nor the intellect to make a methodical, organized society function, even on such a small scale.

Trundles are ruled by the strongest oaf in the community, who claims the title of chief, & governs by whim. An oaf may challenge the chief to an unarmed wrestling match for control of the community at any time. The winner is declared chief, & the loser is typically exiled from the trundle. Most oaves, however, would never think of doing such a thing, as the position caries very little real power, & the effort to take, keep & maintain such a job makes the post an extremely unappealing one.

The position of chief is not a difficult one, as there is little to do. Oaves, despite their idleness, are fairly self-sufficient. The chief only really get involved in the affairs of the other oaves when there is a conflict with other races. A chief may be male or female, but leans slightly toward females, as they tend to be a little bit stronger on average.

The chief appoints a few oaves in the trundle to patrol the perimeter of the trundle & warn of danger. These oaves are known as Watchers. Their task isn’t hard, as it mostly involves sitting around & looking at things. Most bandits know that oaves have no great wealth, invaders rarely care for the badlands oaves usually inhabit, & the oaves for their part are too lazy to trouble their neighbors overly much. Most oaves, however, don’t enjoy even this small responsibility, as the job is generally a boring one & they cannot play oaven games while guarding the trundle’s borders. Many Watchers do a poor job, slacking off & sleeping on the job. Some wise chiefs appoint industrious oaves to this duty, both to give them something to do & to get them away from other oaves.

 

Tribes

Not all oaves live in trundles; some find that settling down in even those chaotic hamlets to be too orderly & restrictive. Some oaves prefer to live a nomadic lifestyle of wandering from place to place, foraging for whatever they can find, lounging where they may, without care for neighbors, borders, & communal obligations. These barbarian oaves eke out a living in the fertile wilderness, trading with other races only when they have need for things that the forests & jungles of the world cannot provide.

These savages view other oaves as foolish imitators of other humanoids, slaves to the misguided notion that settling down in one place can bring wealth & abundance. Although just as indolent & dense as their sedentary brethren, these tribal oaves have an ever greater wisdom concerning how to easily find resources to exploit, & they often become skilled Scavengists (see Prestige Classes, below).

 

Exiles

When an oaf has committed a severe crime against his community, or is likely to repeat the crime if merely beaten, then that oaf is exiled from the trundle. The chief orders him to leave for a set period of time. That oaf must go, & cannot remain within sight of the trundle, under penalty of execution. The time of exile varies according to the whim of the chief, but diligent or restless oaves are usually only cast out for days or weeks, endangering trade with neighbors & the like can get an oaf exiled for months or years, & heinous transgressions against the trundle can lead to permanent expulsion. Exile is a severe punishment in the mind of an oaf. An exiled oaf must work hard to provide for themselves in every way, & cannot depend on the trundle for support. Some see it as a fate worse than death.

            An exiled oaf typically takes one of four paths: they join another trundle, enter civilized society, suffer until their exile is expired, or they starve to death. Joining another trundle can be difficult, as the other oaves would be suspicious as to where the exile came from. Entering civilized society can be awkward, as oaves are not naturally cultured, & lack many social graces (including literacy, in most cases). Abiding their exile can be an arduous, lonely affair, full of labor as the exile struggles to survive. And there is always the final alternative…

 

Religion

The oaves are an impious lot, not prone to wasting energy on needless veneration. They do, however, have a number of gods; indeed, an entire pantheon. These gods are rarely worshipped in any organized way, & in fact many oaves lead a rather secular life, unlike most other races. Oaves do not often pray, & like with any other task, would much rather lay around doing nothing instead.

Most oaves consider the feeling of deep contentment after a big meal a religious experience; or the joy of sitting around in the Fire Circle with friends & family, telling stories & Boasting; or laying down for a long nap. Oaves have a different sense of piety that most others, but they believe it all the same.

Oaf Heaven

According to the oaves, the ultimate reward for a good life is eternal relaxation in a calm, pleasant land where food falls from the sky & everything is downhill.

Oaf Hell

Oaven elders warn their children that those who deny the oaven way are taken to a harsh, vile land where everything is difficult, & labor is unavoidable.

 

Oaf Pantheon

Ofo

Greater God (Chaotic Neutral)

Ofo is the oaven god of strength, & the creator of the oaves. He is also known as the Careless One & the Absent Oaf. He was chided after creating the oaven race, as the other oaven gods didn’t want to be responsible for any mortals. He appears as a large, brown-skinned oaf with white hair, sparkling green eyes & massive powerful arms. He wears red leather breaches & a red tunic. He is usually depicted bearing an enormous wooden club. He rarely if ever involves himself in the affairs of his children. The oaves pray to him when they need to fight or need protection, but although he does supply divine casters with spells, he does not usually intervene in worldly affairs. His symbol is a wooden club with a nail driven through it.

Portfolio: Creation, defense, laziness, oaves, power, strength

Domains: Chaos, Protection, Strength, War

Favored Weapon: Great Club

 

Gulu

Intermediate God (Neutral)

The god of ease, Gulu is stronger Ofo, yet is somehow even lazier. He was the leader of the oaven gods, but relinquished his title after the creation of the oaves. He harbors no malice toward Ofo, as he wants nothing more than to play & be idle. A large, obese oaf with long black hair, warm brown eyes & a sleepy grin, he yawns & stretches frequently. He is dressed in loose black furs, & is barefoot. It is said that he could defeat any god he wanted to, but that he desires only peace & rest. When the oaves frolic, lounge or nap, they are (in their own way) silently praising their mightiest god. His symbol is a Rock-Toss stone striking a tree stump.

Portfolio: Enjoyment, games, laziness, leisure, play

Domains: Earth, Death, Strength, Air

Favored Weapon: Throwing Stone

 

Rozo

Lesser Goddess (Chaotic Evil)

Rozo is evil, yet dumb & foolish. She has concocted many wicked schemes to gain power over the other oaven deities, but she always fails, usually undone by her own stupidity. As the goddess of theft, she is responsible for the larcenous side of the oaves. She appears as a white-skinned oaf, fat yet well muscled, with long greasy red hair & murky gray eyes. She wears a silver dress that fits her poorly, & she is adorned with much jewelry. Oaves pray to her when they need something & they wish to take it, or when they wish to be sneaky. Her symbol is a pouch of coins with a dagger stabbed through it.

Portfolio: Betrayal, bullying, greed, theft

Domains: Chaos, Destruction, Evil, Trickery

Favored Weapon: Sap

 

Emej

Lesser Goddess (Chaotic Neutral)

Lady Emej is the goddess of nature, as capricious as she is ruthless. She delights in changing the weather rapidly & causing natural disasters, all for the benefit of the flora & fauna. Easily the wisest among the oaven gods, Emej is the one responsible for blessing the oaves with an aptitude for trade. She appears as a thin, gray-skinned oaf woman, with brown hair & icy blue eyes. She wears a heavy leather cloak & banded sandals, & always carries a jangling wooden talisman. She is revered for her mastery over nature, & worshipped so as to appease her violent mood swings. Her symbol is lightning streaked storm cloud.

Portfolio: Nature, foraging, trade, weather

Domains: Animal, Chaos, Plant, Travel

Favored Weapon: Morningstar

 

Higi

Lesser God (Neutral)

Completely mad, the wild, free-spirited Higi is the oaven god of luck, magic & storytelling. It is he who tripped across sorcery as a means of avoiding work, & it is he who gave the oaves the gift of storytelling. He looks like a small, pale oaf-child, barely old enough for the Toiling, with smoky gray hair & fiery red eyes. He wears a pair of white leather breeches, a white fur vest, & white leather boots. He is always holding a walking stick, as if he were about to embark on a journey. Oaves tell many tales of his madness, his luck & his magic, often praying to him to grant them the last two, but not the first. His symbol is a small green flame.

Portfolio: Insanity, luck, magic, storytelling

Domains: Fire, Luck, Magic, Water

Favored Weapon: Staff

 

Vama

Lesser Goddess (Chaotic Good)

The goddess of prosperity, Vama is a lonely deity. Dull-witted yet kind, she is shunned by the other oaf gods for her generosity & drive to work hard making things better. She is thought to provide the oaves with abundant game to hunt, fertile woods to forage in, & fecund rivers to fish in. Her appearance belies her power: she is a plain-looking, swarthy-skinned oaf woman, with wide hips, long wavy blonde hair, & kind golden eyes. She wears pale gray robes, & walks about barefoot. Despite her unpopularity with the other oaven gods, many oaves adore her & tell of her praises, both for her charity & her compassion. Her symbol is a trio of blueberries.

Portfolio: Giving, kindness, prosperity

Domains: Chaos, Good, Healing, Sun

Favored Weapon: Mace

 

Oaf History & Folklore: Mythic Origins

The story of the oaves begins with the story of the oaven gods. In the time before Time, the oaven gods were the laughing stock of the deities. They were content to lie around, doing nothing, while the other gods made decisions concerning the nature of the multiverse, created planes in which to live, & made mortal races in their image. The oaven gods did none of this, & were ridiculed because of their indolence.

            The leader of the oaven gods, Gulu, was unconcerned by this, caring not for how the other divinities viewed him & his brethren. Another oaf-god, Ofo, was angry at the derision they had received, & was determined to silence the laughter. He was not wise, but he knew that to make the other gods respect him & his god-kin, he would have to make a mortal race. Like his siblings, though, he was quite lazy, he didn’t want to have to work hard to make mortals. He certainly didn’t want the mortals that he made to ask him to do anything. So he looked at the other gods, & saw how they made mortals. He studied the mortal shapes, watched how they had been made. Then he went to work, for the first (& hopefully the last) time.

            Ofo made his people partly in his own image. They looked like humans, only they would be larger, like he was larger than the other gods. He made them strong, as he was strong, so they could do things easily. He made them tough, as he was tough, so they wouldn’t get hurt or ill easily. He made them dumb, as he was dumb, so they would not think too much, philosophizing about the divine & making more work for him later. He wanted them to be able to care for themselves, so that he wouldn’t have to care for them later.

He was not the best sculptor, though, & they came out as somewhat clumsy, misshapen beings. That was alright with him; he wasn’t concerned with perfection, he merely wanted a mortal race to show the other gods, & he didn’t care about their quality. He then went to show the other gods what he had made.

The other gods were quite surprised. They had never expected the oaven gods to do anything to contribute to the multiverse, & here they had created a race of people, albeit ugly & loutish. The other oaven gods were shocked too, as they had not heard of Ofo’s efforts earlier, & had never seen him make such great efforts before (nor would they since). None of the gods knew what to do with either Ofo or his creation. When they could again speak, there were many questions.

Moradin, Father of the Dwarves, asked Ofo, “What do you call your people?”

Ofo had not thought about this, as he was unaccustomed to thinking. He was not the leader of the oaven gods, Gulu was. But Gulu did not speak up; he had nothing to do with this, & was not the sort to take credit that was undue him. Gulu simply looked at Ofo, waiting for him to speak.

“I guess, um, I would name them, uh, after myself,” Ofo said hesitantly. “So they will, er, they will be called ‘Oaf.’ Yes, Oaf is their name.”

Gruumsh then asked pointedly, “Where will they live? All the lands are taken. There is no place for this oaf to live.”

“The oaf will live wherever he can,” piped in Rozo, one of the oaven goddesses. “We will make sure that the oaf can take care of himself.”

These questions & answers continued on for a time, but all was eventually settled. The oaven gods each agreed to offer gifts to Ofo’s creation, embracing it as their own. Rozo gave the oaf the gift of greed, & a penchant to take what he wants. Gulu gave him his laziness, as well as his love of games. Emej granted her adaptability to change & a talent for trade. Higi provided the oaf with a desire to tell stories & use magic. Young Vama gave the oaf a spark of kindness, & vowed to provide for the oaves, dedicating herself to supply their ongoing needs.

Although the other oaves were mad at Ofo for working behind their backs & not consulting them, they realized that they now had something that they lacked before: a purpose. For better or for worse, they now had a race of people in the world of mortals that depended on them. Despite their misgivings toward Ofo, he had done what they could not or would not, & for that he was eventually given the title of leader among the oaven gods. And as for the oaves, although for the most part, they were created with the intent of being left to fend for themselves, they would always have the oaven gods to watch over them (if nothing else).

 

Oaf History & Folklore: Legends

The First Trundle

            This tale begins long ago, the oaves still a young nomadic race. A tribe of oaves were wandering through a vast plain of barren grassland. They were tired; they had walked far, they were hungry, & they had worked a lot harder than they ever wanted to lately. At last they came upon the edge of a valley. This was a lush river basin, teeming with fruitful trees & ample game.

The oaves were astounded by the bounty of the vale, but the chief told them to wait. He was a cautious, wary leader, & those traits had served him well for many a season. He told his tribe to wait a moment while he surveyed the wide fertile dell. He stepped to the edge of the first ravine & scanned the area for any sign of danger. As he stood there at the edge of the gully, the ground beneath him gave away. He slid down the hill & began to roll, into the valley.

The other oaves, as obedient as they were dim, were bewildered by the chief’s fall. But were he went, they would follow. So they all curled themselves up tight, & began to roll down the hill after him. When they all reached the valley floor, the found that the plentiful dale could feed them for years to come. They could forage, hunt & scavenge here forever, if they liked.

So the chief declared that the tribe would wander no more; they had trundled into their home. And so the oaves stayed in that remote wooded gulch, living happily off the riches of the land, in ease & comfort, from then on. They had made the first lasting settlement of the oaves, without really making anything at all. They had become the first trundle.

 

The Lazy Hero

            One day, an oaf by the name of Torp was lazing in a forest glade, when a group of adventurers came running out of the woods. They were exhausted, & they told the oaf in between gasps for breath that they were being pursued by a pack of bloodthirsty gnolls. The party asked for the oaf’s help in fighting the gnoll pack. Torp, although dumb, was shrewd enough to ask what was in it for him. The party offered him all of the treasure that they had on them if he would help them fight.

            Torp considered this with his meager intellect. On one hand, he could refuse to get involved. It would be easy to walk away & do nothing. Torp liked to do nothing; it was what he was doing when this team of travelers interrupted him. On the other hand, they most likely had a lot of gold on them, & that gold would buy a lot of things for him & his tribe. That way, he could do nothing for a long time, not even hunt, & so could the rest of his clan. He was strong, he knew how to fight. It just might be easy.

            Torp agreed to fight with the party. They shook on the deal & prepared for gnolls together. The gnoll pack soon caught up with the party, & in the forest glade, there was a great battle. Although the pack was surprised by the addition of an oaf to the party, they still had a decisive numerical advantage. They overpowered the team, & captured them. The oaf ran away, cursing himself for failing to defeat the gnolls, & cursing himself more for trying in the first place.

            Torp decided that there was nothing for it; he must rescue the party from the gnolls, or all his efforts would be wasted, which the oaf could not bear. He followed the pack. They were carrying the party through the densest part of the forest, towards a fetid, sinister swamp that the oaf knew to be treacherous. If he attacked them alone, he would almost certainly lose & could possibly die. If he did nothing, there was a way that he could win.

            The gnoll pack carried the captured adventurers through the last of the woods, to the edge of the marsh. As they began to cross what they had thought was shallow water, they quickly started to sink. The pack tried to free themselves, but between the sucking mud of the mire, their metal armor, & the added weight of the party on their backs, there was no escape. They were caught, & soon they would all sink below the algae-encrusted waters.

            Torp appeared then at the edge of the bog, with a length of rope. He tossed out the rope to the party &, one by one, managed to haul them out of the fens before they sank in like the gnolls. The adventurers were quite grateful for the assistance of the oaf, & they kept their promise, giving him all of the gold that they had on them before going on their way. He was now a very rich oaf, & he learned a valuable lesson. He had tried to help people, & he had failed. Only when he did nothing did he become a hero.

 

The Chest & the Gnome

            An oaf woman was walking down a path one day. She was getting tired & bored, as she had walked out of sight of her trundle. So the oaven female, whose name was Gree, decided to lay down by the side of the road & rest. Just as she was falling asleep, she was startled awake by a wagon rumbling by. The wagon was being pulled by a team of horses, & was thundering up the road a rapid gait. Just as the wagon passed where she lay, the wagon hit a bump, & a wooden chest bounced off the cart, landing at her side. Knowing a lucky find when she saw one, she grabbed the chest & hid within the underbrush. She looked out again from the bushes to survey the path.

            The path was clear, & though Gree waited, the wagon never returned to collect their fallen chest. Curious as to what it was that she’d found, she opened the chest. She was surprised that it wasn’t locked, but shocked by its contents. Inside was a great golden treasure; coins & jewels filled the coffer to the brim, sparkling in the daylight. With this chest, her trundle wouldn’t have to work for years, & she’d be a hero for her find.

Once she had waited long enough, she left the scrub with the chest. The coffer was heavy, but she was strong, & it would not be very far. She began to walk down the road, back toward her trundle. She had not walked for long before she met a gnome on the path.

The gnome greeted her warmly, “Good day to you, m’lady!”

“Uh, h’llo, little elf-boy,” Gree spoke warily, eyeing the gnome with caution.

The gnome, taken aback, said to her, “So, uh, where are you going with that chest there?”

Gree responded, “I go back to my trundle with it.”

“Oh, really? That’s too bad,” said the gnome, with a glum look on his face.

“Why bad? To bring back chest to trundle is good, elf-boy,” stated Gree, getting a bit annoyed at this interruption of her journey. The chest was heavy, & she didn’t want to carry it any farther than she had to.

“Well,” began the gnome, with a look of sympathy in his eyes, “it’s just that a nice oaf-woman like yourself must come from a nice, er, trundle. And I’d hate to see anything bad happen to your trundle, just because you brought that cursed chest back home.”

“What? What did you say?” Gree asked, suddenly alarmed. “This chest not cursed! It is good chest.”

“Do you think so? Tell me then, how did you come across this chest of yours, if you say it’s not cursed.”

Gree told the gnome of how the wagon came roaring by, & the chest bounced out, landing at her feet.

“Ah, you see! Now, why would the people on that wagon throw out a perfectly good chest? Hmm?” the gnome asked her pointedly.

“I don’t know,” responded Gree, suddenly unsure about her find.

“And why would the chest land at your feet?” the gnome pressed on. “Unless it wants you to take it back to your village. I mean trundle.”

“Hmm,” though Gree, setting down the heavy chest. “That is strange, elf-boy.”

“I bet that it’s full of evil spirits that will attack & possess your people, turning them into mindless slaves,” guessed the gnome excitedly.

“No, it’s not,” protested the oaf. “It’s full of coins. And gems. Sparkly gems.”

“Oh, yeah?” retorted the gnome. “Well, I bet those coins & gems all have evil spirits in ‘em, & they can’t wait to get to your trundle & take over your people!”

“No! That can’t be true,” exclaimed Gree, getting worried. “Say it’s not true!”

“Well, there’s only one way to be sure,” explained the gnome, with an air of reluctance. “Try & open the chest.”

“That’s easy,” said Gree dismissively. She bent down & lifted the lid to the coffer, exposing the treasure. The gnome shrank back, as if in fear.

“Close it, hurry! You’ll let the evil spirits out,” yelled the gnome. Gree quickly slammed the lid down & backed away from the chest, staring at it anxiously.

“Whew, that was close,” said the gnome. “Now, I should try to open the chest. If it opens for me, then it’s just a regular ol’ treasure chest. If I can’t open it, then it is cursed, & it wants to destroy your trundle.”

“Okay. That sounds smart. Be careful, elf-boy,” warned Gree, as she took another step backward.

The gnome approached the chest. He gripped the lid & pulled with all of his might. He strained terribly, but to no avail.

Finally, he gave up, exhausted. Breathing heavily, he said to Gree, “It’s no use. The chest wants to go with you. It won’t open for anyone else now. If you take this back to your trundle, your people are doomed.”

“What do I do? I don’t want my people doomed!” cried Gree, growing afraid.

“You must leave this chest here. Don’t open it, don’t touch it,” the gnome ordered Gree, in grave tones. “You must return to your trundle, & don’t look back. Tell your people to leave the chest on the road alone. Let someone else take it, so the spirit will possess them, not you. That is the only way to escape this curse.”

Gree was happy to comply. “Thank you, elf-boy. You saved my trundle! I must go now, to escape the curse.” And with that, the oaf-woman was gone, back to her home.

Alone on the path with the chest, the gnome opened the lid, looked inside at the treasure he had swindled from the foolish oaf, & laughed quietly to himself. He then closed the lid & began to drag the heavy coffer back to his own home.

 

Language

Oavish is the language of the oaves. It is not a pretty tongue, as the oaves are not a pretty people. It is a crude, simple speech, for a crude, simple folk. This guttural, harsh language uses an extremely simple uniform syntax, using body language & situational context to specify meaning & circumstance.

There are as many dialects as there are trundles, but most of them are easy to comprehend, if one knows the basics of Oavish speech. There are almost no multi-syllable words in Oavish, as larger words are quite tricky for many oaves to say. A sentence in Oavish is almost never constructed with articles, so most statements & questions posed in it are as short as the words themselves. Often, an oaf will merely point at his subject & make a one word statement or command to convey his meaning. The language uses the Dwarven runic script, but it is rarely if ever written down, as most oaves are illiterate in any tongue, including their own.

Oavish is not a tongue well-suited to advanced subjects. Topics such as history, literature, science, medicine, poetry, engineering, & philosophy are all difficult (if not impossible) to render in Oavish. This language is best used for discussing themes of leisure: freedom, playing, sleeping, lounging, games, rest, entertainment & other indolent pastimes. Only in these matters can Oavish be used to its full effect.

The stories of the oaves are almost never written. In fact, there are hardly any records of oaven literature at all. These are mostly just recipes, historical records, game rules, accounts of great interest, & other easily-forgotten matters. It is only the rare oaf who enjoys the hobby of rune-carving (or an industrious oaven outcast) that contributes to the oaven written body, & so it rarely represents Oaven culture as whole with any accuracy.

Oavish Phrasebook

The following oaven phrases may come up at the gaming table with some regularity. Depending on your play style, you can use the actual Oavish words or their Common (i.e.: English) translations when you’re playing an oaf PC.

Ush nog ush zi. “Having is easier than not having.” This adage is an oaven appeal to greed. Oaves use it to encourage others to take things, or to justify their own actions.

Du ofos ulg ba du durfs magz. “Work is to oaves what trees are to dwarves.” This is a proverb that means two things. First, that labor is against the oaven way. Secondly, all creatures have their natural place in the order of life.

Gol urx az heg, urx az jom. “When the orcs want your land, the orcs can take your land.” Not only does this axiom literally warn of the depredations of orcs (& other evil monstrous humanoids), but it also advises that possessions are unimportant compared to one’s freedom & safety.

Ofos isk vu yunz sep gruj. “Oaves are wise in the ways of fun & games.” Though oaves may be simple, dull-witted creatures, they know how to have a good time.

Ofo ulg zi ulg riv dap. “An oaf not working is working hard at rest.” Extolling the virtues of relaxation over labor, this maxim is popular among oaves attempting to explain the nature of their culture to non-oaves.

Yunz ig! Thab ig! “For the games! For the trundle!” This is the most common battle cry, rallying others to fight for their trundles, as well as their normally carefree lifestyle.

Nog thar kem. “That’s easier than rolling down a hill.” This is a saying that means that the action being discussed is an extremely easy one to do, even for an oaf.

Pir folm zi, gruj folm lesh. “There is no such thing as lazy; there is only smart.” This motto is often used by oaves who are loafing, lounging, shirking duties given to them by others, or otherwise procrastinating.

Riv ulgo. “Hard worker.” This simple epithet is actually one of the harsher Oavish curses, giving insight into how the oaves view labor, not to mention those who are foolish enough to do it.

 

Oavish Runes

Based on Low Dwarven, the runic language of the oaves, known as the Ulrig Script (named for the first 5 letters of its alphabet), is rarely used. Most oaves are illiterate, & many who are able to read can scarcely do more than scratch out their own names. The runes used by the more erudite oaves are mostly simplified versions of the Dwarven script. Consisting of only 17 characters (4 less than Low Dwarven), this written script uses sharp, angular shapes, much more rough & basic than the sophisticated runes of the dwarves.

Oaves do commonly use the runes to carve their names into objects that they claim, such as clubs, rocks, sticks, slaves, tents, clothes, et cetera. They also occasionally carve crude signs to warn others away from their trundles, or lead other oaves to a hidden location. Oavish literature rarely if ever rises above this level, which amounts to little more than mere graffiti. Oaven children are not usually taught how to read or write the runes unless there is a reason to do so; only the elders of a trundle (& sometimes the chief) are truly literate.

 

Naming

Each oaven name typically consists of only a single word, usually the adjective form of a common noun or verb. They are just as likely to have names that refer to what many races consider bad traits, such as stupidity, sloth, & filthiness, as they are to have positive trait names, like intelligence, strength, & pleasance. Most oaves are simple, humble creatures, so it is rare of an oaf to be pretentious or vane enough to use a multi-syllable name. Seldom is an oaf prestigious enough to warrant a compound name.

When constructing an oaven name, consult the table below:

• D%: 01-90; Result: Roll once on the Name Table
• D%: 91-95; Result: Roll twice on the Name Table, combine the 2 names in exact order
• D%: 96-00; Result: Roll twice on the Name Table, combine the 2 names in reverse order

 

Male Names		Female Names
Tharg	tired	Fush	bald, bare
Torp	gentle, tender	Leb	sick, ill
Nak	wild, aggressive	Voch	gaunt, lanky, bony
Zaj	primitive, barbaric, savage	Oom	simple, easy
Faz	funny, humorous	Sheel	beautiful, attractive
Gorb	hungry	Hech	tired, exhausted, weary
Bruth	sticky, adhesive	Gree	lucky, fortunate
Sharl	unfriendly, cruel, mean	Urch	hairy, fuzzy, furry, wooly
Arz	dirty	Skun	ugly, repulsive
Grol	slow	Dev	mute, “dumb”, unable to speak
Wog	retarded, simple-minded	Spuk	silly, absurd, wacky
Elch	round, circular	Erk	handicapped, crippled, disabled
Chim	drunk, intoxicated, inebriated	Tog	dull, boring, dreary
Nach	boss, leader	Shad	odorous, aromatic
Mik	angry, mad	Gruj	smart, intelligent
Thom	tough, sturdy, rugged, robust	Buv	chubby, plump, stout
Kul	squat, pudgy	Ith	puffy, swollen, bloated
Rej	stinky, malodorous	Urz	wise
Gar	not hungry, well fed	Vog	fat, obese
Pir	lazy, lethargic, unmotivated	Riv	complex, difficult, hard
Og	stupid, unintelligent	Shuj	beginning, starting, first, initial
Skeb	enough, plenty, abundant	Hov	short, low
Ath	tall, high, elevated	Sish	loud, noisy
Joch	free, liberated	Vap	thin, slender
Dorb	muscular, brawny, robust	Fet	chosen
Grush	moist, damp, humid	Pum	healthy, well
Ux	huge, immense	Laj	mundane, ordinary
Rul	stale, rotten, decayed	Ilch	young, youthful
Kib	loose, lax, relaxed, slack	Gim	fast, quick, swift
Jav	patient, waiting	Cham	inactive, lethargic, slothful
Shem	impatient, restless, eager	Theg	active, vigorous, busy, energetic
Tum	immobile, sessile, still	Diz	dormant, asleep, unconscious
Fen	motivated, industrious	Vur	awake, mobile, conscious
Pol	blind, unable to see	Bem	deaf, unable to hear
Esh	peasant	Mil	orphan
Nef	slave, servant, serf	Oln	hermit, recluse
Suth	hunter, predator	Zorm	mistress
Skig	pilgrim, traveler	Hig	thief, burglar
Alch	male, boy, man	Ursk	female, girl, woman
Loj	bandit, robber, mugger	Rud	scout, spy
Iv	hooligan, ruffian, ne’er-do-well	Klom	musician, singer
Gurb	pirate	Jub	prophet, fortune teller, oracle
Chav	jester, joker	Shik	healer, nurse, midwife
Theg	warrior	Tal	defender, protector
Dulp	fool, idiot, moron	Flib	avenger
Veln	meat	Elz	nadir, foundation, base
Kur	barbarian	Mo	zenith, peak, crest, apex
Dag	puddle, pool	Prus	button
Moz	barrel, keg	Bish	buckle
Hom	cheese	Fuj	jar, bottle

 

Oaven Communities

Oaven Economy

Within an oaven community; commerce (if one could call it that) is done on a strictly barter system. They don’t mint their own currency, & can find or earn coins only on an occasional basis, so they mostly do without. They trade goods & services for other goods & services, all without coinage ever changing hands. This means that they typically have very little use for legal tender. In fact, an oaf that manages to obtain any actual money is apt to keep the coin as a trinket.

Being somewhat foolish & uncivilized, oaves have been known to use a coin for purposes that it wasn’t intended for. For instance, more than one oaf who enjoyed hammering things has pounded a couple of nail-holes into a coin, creating a shiny button for his clothing. Some oaves also weave coins into their matted hair. The larger ones even use small coins to replace missing teeth!

 

d%	Community Size	Population*	GP Limit**
01-60	Trundle	20-80	20gp
61-90	Camp	81-400	50gp
91-98	Village	401-900	100gp
99-100	Small Town	901-2,000	400gp
***	Large Town	2,001-5,000	1,500gp
***	Small City	5,001-12,000	7,500gp
****	Large City	12,001-25,000	20,000gp
****	Metropolis	25,001 or more	50,000gp

 

* -Adult population; the number of non-adults in an oaven community ranges from 20% to 40% of the adult population.

** -These values are 50% of what can be found in non-oaven communities, as oaves have few resources & commodities.

*** -Large oaven towns & cities exist only where the DM chooses, & are never generated randomly.

**** -Large oaven cities & metropolises are virtually non-existent, & should only be created via extraordinary (most likely magical) means.

 

Example Trundle

Dungwater (AKA Pulgorm)

            This tiny, squalid village of the oaves lies in the middle of a fetid swamp. Located on the shores of a swift-flowing river in a gloomy, mist-prone valley, this town is difficult to get to. Most other races don’t consider a trip to the oaven lands worth the trouble, & that suits the oaves just fine.

The valley is surrounded by forest, with a nearby mountain range housing dwarves & giants. Elves & humans populate the lowlands & plains nearby, but they leave this foul, dank mire alone for the most part, under the pretext of the river’s frequent flooding. The main threats to the continued sanctity of the trundle are factions of trolls & lizardfolk. These tiny enclaves are usually too engaged with battling one another to contend with the oaves, but they pose a serious danger should they focus on the tribe.

• Thorp: Conventional Power Center (chief); Alignment Chaotic Neutral; 20gp limit; Assets 7,830gp; Population: 87 (68 adults, 19 children; 31 houses); Isolated (83 oaves, 2 giants, 1 ogre, & 1 troll)
• Full Time Soldiers: 0
• Militia Members (Watchers, AKA Holz): 4
• Law Rank: -9

 

Dorb, the Chief (Nai)

            Chief Dorb does not want his position. He would rather laze around like the other oaves, playing & lounging all day. When he was younger, he was the trundle’s best hunter, easily catching game & fish for the tribe. He was nominated for chief, & the other oaves voted for him. Nobody else was better qualified, & nobody else wanted the job.

            He is a reluctant leader. He has tried to quit several times, but the other oaves won’t allow it. There must be a chief, & he is it. He is now resigned to leadership, finding it easier to carry out the few duties than to quarrel with the rest of the trundle. This still makes him grumpy, humorless, stern & a bit sad, but he is a capable leader nonetheless.

• Male oaf barbarian 7; CR 8; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 7d12+21; HP 75; Init +1; Speed 30’; AC 16, touch 11, flatfooted 14; BAB +7; Grapple +12; Attack +12 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +10 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); Full Attack +12/+6 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +10/+5 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); SA rage 2/day, Uncanny Dodge; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/ Disease); Alignment Chaotic Good; Saving Throw Fort +10, Ref +3, Will +3; Str 20, Dex 12, Con 17, Int 8, Wis 8, Cha 10
• Skills & Feats: Climb +6, Craft (tent) +4, Handle Animal +2, Hide +3, Intimidate +10, Jump +11, Knowledge (nature) +3, Listen +8, Ride +4, Swim +10, Survival +3; Iron Will, Leadership, Self-Sufficient
• Age: 34; Height: 7’11”; Weight: 336 lbs; Skin: mocha; Eyes: brown; Hair: black
• Language: Oavish (illiterate), Common
• Possessions: greatclub, hide armor, +2 shield

 

Urz, the Elder (Nee)

            Urz has been the trundle’s elder for as long as anyone can remember. She has advised the last three chief’s, including Dorb, & she enjoys the authority without the responsibility of actually leading the tribe. Old & frail, she has had health problems as of late, & is always on the lookout for medicine.

            She serves as the trundle’s seer, making prophecies & aiding the tribe with simple magics. She is very distrustful of outsiders, viewing travelers & traders with suspicion, as well as advising against more established relations with the surrounding peoples. She has a tense relationship with Dorb; he doesn’t mind her stepping on his toes & commanding the trundle, but he finds her prophecies to be worthless & her mistrust of the outside world hindering.

• Female oaf sorceress 5/oaven firestarter 3; CR 9; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 8d4+24; HP 47; Init -2; Speed 30’; AC 8, touch 8, flatfooted 8; BAB +3; Grapple +7; Attack +7 melee (1d6+4/1d6+4/×2, quarterstaff); Full Attack +7 melee (1d6+4/1d6+4/×2, quarterstaff); SA magic, Kindle Flame, Whittle Club, Fire Affinity; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Chaotic Neutral; Saving Throw Fort +5, Ref +0, Will +9; Str 19, Dex 6, Con 16, Int 11, Wis 14, Cha 14
• Skills & Feats: Alchemy +2; Bluff +5, Concentration +7, Craft (tent) +5, Craft (campfire) 2, Diplomacy +2, Heal +4, Knowledge (arcana) +6, Scry +5, Spellcraft +10, Survival +8; Brew Potion, Self-Sufficient
• Age: 53; Height: 7’1”; Weight: 288 lbs; Skin: tan; Eyes: green; Hair: white
• Language: Oavish, Common, Giant
• Magic: 0-level (6/day), 1-level (7/day), 2-level (7/day) ), 3-level (6/day), 4-level (4/day)
• Possessions: quarterstaff, hide armor, spell component pouch, 41gp

 

Ath, the Watcher (Hol)

            A tough, strong oaf, Ath guards the perimeter of the trundle with the rest of the Watchers, keeping an eye out for signs of trouble or intruders. It is not a difficult chore; bandits long ago realized that the oaves have no treasure, conquerors noted the oaves simplicity & laziness, & monsters rarely traverse far into the marshlands. Still, most oaves are loath to have even this minor responsibility.

Ath likes to be alone, & he’s a formidable combatant, so he’s well suited to the task of guarding the trundle. In truth, he spends most of his time wandering the edge of the swamp & the surrounding woods. He is quite content to play by himself, lolling about the wilderness. He has a hard time interacting with others, so he is usually quite uncomfortable in social situations.

• Male oaf fighter 3; CR 4; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 4d10+9; HP 31; Init +3; Speed 30’; AC 13, touch 9, flatfooted 13; BAB +3; Grapple +7; Attack +7 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +4 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); Full Attack +7 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +4 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Chaotic Neutral; Saving Throw Fort +6, Ref +0, Will +3; Str 19, Dex 9, Con 16, Int 9, Wis 14, Cha 13
• Skills & Feats: Listen +4, Spot +5, Survival +3, Tumble +2; Alertness, Combat Reflexes, Improved Initiative, Run
• Age: 19; Height: 7’5”; Weight: 244 lbs; Skin: pale; Eyes: hazel; Hair: brown
• Language: Oavish (illiterate), Common
• Possessions: greatclub, chain shirt

 

Oom, the Watcher (Hol)

            Oom is a tough, strict oaf woman, well-adapted to the roll of sentry. Once as indolent as the rest of the oaves, her life changed dramatically when she became a mother a few years back. After giving birth, she became worried about the safety of the trundle, & decided to become a Watcher. Although she is still somewhat lax in her duties, her relative vigilance has worried those close to her in the trundle.

            Oom is the mother of Sish, a young oaf-girl who is about to enter the Toiling. She is quite protective of her daughter, & indeed the rest of the tribe as well. Her care for their well being often leads her to recommend warring with outside forces, or even moving the trundle entirely. It is all Chief Dorb can do to dissuade her from rash judgments that could endanger the tribe further, despite her good intentions.

• Female oaf barbarian 4; CR 5; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 4d12+16; HP 46; Init +0; Speed 30’; AC 13, touch 10, flatfooted 13; BAB +4; Grapple +9; Attack +9 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +6 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); Full Attack +9 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +6 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); SA rage 2/day, Uncanny Dodge; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Chaotic Good; Saving Throw Fort +10, Ref +1, Will +3; Str 20, Dex 11, Con 18, Int 6, Wis 14, Cha 12
• Skills & Feats: Climb +6, Knowledge (nature) +1, Listen +7, Spot +4, Survival +8; Great Fortitude, Power Attack
• Age: 21; Height: 6’10”; Weight: 267 lbs; Skin: tan; Eyes: brown; Hair: black
• Language: Oavish (illiterate)
• Possessions: greatclub, hide armor

 

Theg, the Watcher (Hol)

            One of the longest-serving Watchers in the history of the trundle, Theg is an attentive sentinel. Most Watchers retire after only a few months or years on the job, chafing at the duties & tasks involved in the position. Theg, on the other hand, has served as a Watcher for over a decade, & shows no sign of quitting anytime soon. He is diligent, thorough, & prone to making wise decisions that benefit the trundle as a whole.

            His propensity for productivity has gotten him in trouble many times over the years. Dorb has warned him on many occasions to refrain from acting against the oaven way. Theg has even been beaten a few times, as well as repeating a year of Toiling. Dorb threatens to exile him if he continues to act industriously, though the chief is unwilling to lose such a capable asset. Theg trains new Watchers, goes on hunts, confronts approaching visitors, & builds new tents, all with an efficiency & meticulousness that has the leader begrudgingly grateful. Theg, for his part, is troubled by his inability to accept oaven traditions & decorum, & is beginning to express a desire to leave the trundle behind to explore the lands beyond, where he feels there may be a place that he belongs.

• Male oaf barbarian 3; CR 4; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 3d12+6; HP 28; Init -1; Speed 40’; AC 11, touch 9, flatfooted 11; BAB +3; Grapple +7; Attack +7 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +4 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); Full Attack +7 melee (1d10+5/×2, greatclub) or +4 ranged (1d6+1/×2, rock); SA rage 1/day, Uncanny Dodge; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Neutral Good; Saving Throw Fort +5, Ref +0, Will +2; Str 18, Dex 8, Con 15, Int 4, Wis 13, Cha 9
• Skills & Feats: Jump +9, Listen +5, Spot +4, Survival +4; Alertness, Endurance
• Age: 27; Height: 8’2”; Weight: 260 lbs; Skin: peach; Eyes: grey; Hair: none
• Language: Oavish (illiterate)
• Possessions: greatclub, leather armor

 

Bem, the Watcher (Hol)

            The youngest of the Watchers, Bem does not enjoy her job. She detests work with a passion that is common among the oaves. She shirks her duties often, preferring to play Rock-Toss or Boasting rather than patrolling the trundle’s borders. This usually is not much of an issue, but Theg has complained about her negligence to the chief, which is beginning to cause tension.

            Bem is a capable spellcaster, & has collaborated with Urz on occasion for the good of the tribe. Most of the time, though, she prefers to lounge around, staring at the sky in a daze. She ignores her tasks & instead watches the clouds move through the heavens. Because of this, she has earned herself the nickname “Sky-Guard.”

• Female oaf druid 3; CR 4; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 3d8+3; HP 19; Init -2; Speed 30’; AC 8, touch 8, flatfooted 8; BAB +2; Grapple +6; Attack +6 melee (1d6+4/1d6+4/×2, quarterstaff); Full Attack +6 melee (1d6+4/1d6+4/×2, quarterstaff); SA spells, nature sense, animal companion, Woodland Stride, Trackless Step; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Neutral; Saving Throw Fort +4, Ref -1, Will +4; Str 18, Dex 6, Con 13, Int 7, Wis 12, Cha 10
• Skills & Feats: Concentration +3, Handle Animal +3, Listen +7, Spot +9, Survival +6; Alertness, Self-Sufficient
• Age: 15; Height: 7’1”; Weight: 279 lbs; Skin: pale; Eyes: green; Hair: auburn
• Language: Oavish (illiterate)
• Magic: 0-level (4/day), 1-level (3/day), 2-level (1/day)
• Animal Companion: Suth, a Dire Rat; small animal; HD 3d8+3; HP 16; Init +4; Speed 40’ (Climb 20’); AC 18, touch 15, flatfooted 14; Attack +7 melee (1d4/×2, bite); Special Attack disease; SQ scent; Alignment Neutral; Saving Throw Fort +4, Ref +7, Will +4; Str 11, Dex 18, Con 12, Int 1, Wis 12, Cha 4; Skills & Feats: Climb +11, Hide +12, Jump +2; Move Silently +7; Weapon Finesse (bite)
• Possessions: quarterstaff, spell component pouch

 

Fuj, the Trundler (Thal)

            Fuj is the largest oaf in the trundle. Her impressive height & prodigious weight have granted her a strength & durability that is notable even among the oaves. She has put her great size to good use, becoming the tribe’s preeminent trundler. Unfortunately, she has also become the tribe’s most notorious bully, taking what she wants & pushing the other oaves around. She hasn’t yet challenged the authority of Chief Dorb, but her predations are escalating.

            As the trundling champion of the tribe, Fuj is also a formidable combatant, capable of using her rolling talents on the field of battle. Extremely competitive, she will rise to meet any challenge to her dominance, despite her lackadaisical habits. Her desire to prove her utter dominance sometimes outweighs her Oavish laziness.

• Female oaf bard 2/trundler 2; CR 5; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 2d6+2d10+16; HP 38; Init -1; Speed 30’; AC 11, touch 9, flatfooted 11; BAB +3; Grapple +8; Attack +8 melee (1d6+5/×2, club); Full Attack +8 melee (1d6+5/×2, club); SA spells, Bardic Knowledge, Bardic Music, Hard Fall, Rotundity; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Chaotic Neutral; Saving Throw Fort +7, Ref +4, Will +7; Str 21, Dex 8, Con 18, Int 5, Wis 12, Cha 10
• Skills & Feats: Balance +3, Jump +8, Spot +2, Survival +3, Tumble +7; Lightning Reflexes
• Age: 17; Height: 7’11”; Weight: 415 lbs; Skin: sallow; Eyes: brown; Hair: black
• Language: Oavish (illiterate)
• Magic: 0-level (3/day), 1-level (1/day)
• Possessions: club, leather armor, spell component pouch

 

Pol, the Storyteller (Jorg)

            Pol is an oaf of many traits, some of which are contradictory. He is as lazy as the next oaf, & is always up for doing nothing, as long as it doesn’t get in the way of his relaxing. He is, however, the chief diplomat of the clan, negotiating with the other races of the surrounding areas & maintaining peaceful relations with them.

            He is also the trundle’s best Boaster, famed for his meaningful & humorous stories. He is more than capable of enthralling the entire trundle with one of his many epic tales of oaven folklore, as well as paralyzing them with laughter at one of his myriad jokes. He is an elderly oaf, the second-oldest in the trundle (younger only than Urz). He realizes that he will not live for too much longer, so he has begun grooming an apprentice to replace him. He isn’t training as such, as that would be too much effort, but he has found someone interested in learning all of his stories & jokes, someone with a good voice & a sense of timing. Time will tell if that will be enough to continue the Boasting tradition.

• Male oaf bard 5/boaster 2; CR 8; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 7d6+21; HP 48; Init -3; Speed 30’; AC 7, touch 7, flatfooted 7; BAB +4; Grapple +7; Attack +7 melee (1d6+3/×2 subdual, sap); Full Attack +7 melee (1d6+3/×2 subdual, sap); SA spells, Bardic Knowledge, Bardic Speech, Enthrall, Tallest Tale, Glint in the Eye; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/Disease); Alignment Neutral Good; Saving Throw Fort +4, Ref +1, Will +8; Str 17, Dex 5, Con 16, Int 10, Wis 13, Cha 16
• Skills & Feats: Appraise +4, Bluff +11, Craft (tailoring) +3, Diplomacy +12, Gather Information +9, Intimidate +7, Jump +5, Knowledge (history) +4, Knowledge (local) +6, Listen +4, Perform (boast) +8, Search +2, Sense Motive +5, Sleight of Hand +4, Spot +2, Survival +3; Deceitful, Persuasive
• Age: 42; Height: 7’8”; Weight: 270 lbs; Skin: chocolate; Eyes: brown; Hair: gray
• Language: Oavish (illiterate), Common
• Magic: 0-level (3/day), 1-level (4/day), 2-level (2/day)
• Possessions: sap, spell component pouch

 

“Jokey” Gorb, the Storyteller Apprentice

            The youngest official adult in the trundle, Gorb has just completed his Toiling. Eager to throw off the yolk of manual labor, he has embraced his newfound idleness with a kind of passion bordering on zeal. He enjoys lazing like few other oaves, & has a hatred for work & effort that burns like a cancer within him. He has, however, taken an interest in storytelling, particularly the competitive art of Boasting.

            Gorb has been listening to Pol tell tales since he was born, & has a nearly total recall of every joke he has ever heard. This has impressed Pol to the point that he has told young Gorb stories that he has yet to share with any other oaves. Gorb has absorbed this treasure trove of myths, legends & narratives from the oaven histories, as well as the many accounts of other races that the old boaster has heard in his lifetime. Although he is still barely an adult, Gorb is quickly becoming the heir apparent of the Boasting traditions.

• Male oaf bard 1; CR 2; medium monstrous humanoid (oaf); HD 1d6+4; HP 10; Init +0; Speed 30’; AC 11, touch 10, flatfooted 11; BAB +0; Grapple +6; Attack +6 melee (1d6+6/×2, club); Full Attack +6 melee (1d6+6/×2, club); SA spells, Bardic Knowledge, Bardic Speech; Oaf Traits (Powerful Build, +2 vs. Poison/ Disease); Alignment Chaotic Good; Saving Throw Fort +4, Ref +2, Will +5; Str 22, Dex 10, Con 19, Int 8, Wis 17, Cha 13
• Skills & Feats: Balance +2, Bluff +7, Craft (meal) +2, Craft (tent) +1, Diplomacy +4, Gather Information +3, Intimidate +3, Perform (boast) +3, Survival +6; Persuasive
• Age: 12; Height: 6’10”; Weight: 208 lbs; Skin: pale; Eyes: blue; Hair: black
• Language: Oavish (illiterate)
• Magic: 0-level (2/day)
• Possessions: club, padded armor, spell component pouch

 

Other Trundle Members:

• Adepts: 4
• Aristocrats: 0
• Barbarians: 14
• Bards: 7
• Clerics: 1
• Commoners: 32 (19 of them children)
• Druids: 3
• Experts: 4
• Fighters: 3
• Monks: 1
• Paladins: 0
• Rangers: 3
• Rogues: 1
• Sorcerers: 7
• Warriors: 6
• Wizards: 0

 

Creating Oaf Characters

Oaves are challenging characters to roleplay; their laziness & stupidity are difficult to convey in gaming terms, so they force players to create their own motivations while still adhering to “the oaven way.” An oaf PC among non-oaves often has to be convinced that taking an action is not only for the good of the party or the good of the campaign, but also will prevent more labor in the future. Their strength & durability are obvious assets, but are offset by their unintelligent & clumsy nature, coarse habits, & cultural aversion to quests, labor & self-improvement.

Everyone has a different idea of what an oaf should be, & all points of view are equally valid. The oaven tendency towards chaos & self-sufficiency leads them to be a diverse & varied people. Although the oaf barbarian is the most common form, oaves can make excellent bards, sorcerers & fighters.

Regardless of class, when creating an oaven character, you should remember that they always benefit from certain skill choices. Any skill or feat that takes advantage of their Strength & Constitution is recommended. Melee attacks are best, but don’t ignore their thrown weapon bonus; it offsets their Dexterity penalty, making it a viable choice as well. Consider spending points in Survival, even if it’s a cross-class skill, as they receive a racial bonus for it. Avoid dumping points into Hide & Move Silently; points spent on these must first compensate for the racial penalties to both.

The only feat that is exclusive to oaves is Lazy Bones (see below). However, all of the feats & prestige classes detailed below were designed with oaves in mind. Although they are technically available to all races, they play to oaven talents & habits better than any other people.

Oaves as Characters

Because of their particular traits & abilities, oaves lean towards the role of the barbarian or the “big dumb fighter,” the tank of the party who soaks up/deals out damage while the rest of the party attacks the enemy from afar. This is a valid, indeed wise, use of the oaf. However, their high Constitution & tremendous Strength make for a host of viable character types, as we shall see.

Barbarians

Oaves are literally born to be barbarians. Even more so than other monstrous humanoids, oaves eschew civilization, favoring the simple, easy comforts of the wilderness. Big, strong, tough, dumb & rarely literate, the oaf & the barbarian are often one & the same. The already ample bonuses to Strength & Constitution are only further enhanced by the rage ability, & their talent for thrown weapons helps them attack from afar as well. The role of the uncivilized warrior is in perfect harmony with their way of life, & mechanically, there are no real drawbacks to playing oaven barbarians. Oaf Rating: 10

Bards

The stories & boasts of the Fire Circle are an integral part of the oaven culture, & this reflected in their appreciation for the bardic life. Neither oaves nor bards are lawful by nature, & bards have Hide, Move Silently & Tumble as class skills. However, be aware that the Bardic Knowledge feature is based on Intelligence, which the oaf does not possess in abundance. Also, bards tend to be agile, whereas the average oaf is a somewhat inept creature. Oaf Rating: 9

Clerics

Oaves are not a pious or philosophical people, having little use for organized religion. Every once in a while, some oaf has the notion to follow a deity with fervor, but this is a rarity, an exception to the rule. Clerics use bludgeoning weapons & cast helpful spells, but they also rely on a daily hour-long prayer & two key abilities (Wisdom for spells, Charisma for turning/rebuking the undead) that they receive no bonus in. Oaf Rating: 4

Druids

Rarely living within the confines of civilized lands, the oaves would be expected to have some druidic traditions. And they do, after a fashion. The wild shape ability is useful for assuming forms that compensate for their Dexterity weakness, & druidic spells are based on Wisdom, an ability that they take no penalty on. However, oaves are idle homebodies, so they mostly avoid the traveling lifestyle of druids. Also, druids are usually driven to protect their lands from interference from civilized peoples, whereas oaves are seldom driven to do anything, & will often flee from a heated conflict rather than stand their ground. Oaf Rating: 6

Fighters

An oaven fighter is a glorious thing to behold if you’re on his side, but a dreadful thing if you’re not. Their Strength & Constitution benefits, combined with their resistance to infection & bonus to thrown weapons, make for formidable soldiers. However, despite their many strong points, the oaven fighter is not without drawbacks. Oaves often lack formal combat training, & have little desire to exert the energy required to learn the many arts of war. Also, Hide, Move Silently & Tumble are all cross-class skills, & fighters (especially low Intelligence ones) have precious few skill points. Oaf Rating: 7

Monks

Devout & disciplined, monks are lawful & assiduous, nothing like the average oaf. Their key ability is Dexterity, which is one of the oaves’ main weaknesses. They often use Hide & Move Silently, both skills with which the oaves take additional penalties. Monks do gain AC bonuses, which compensate for an oaf’s clumsiness, & their Unarmed Strike is augmented by oaven strength. But for the most part, the oaven way & the way of the monk are incompatible. Oaf Rating: 2

Paladins

Tireless champions of the lawfully righteous, paladins are dedicated, hard-working, & strict; everything that an oaf is not. Although paladins can benefit from an oaf’s physical might, & oaves can take advantage of a special mount, there are numerous downsides to this combination. Paladins rely heavily on Charisma for class features, which is not often a priority for an oaf. The lawful-good Code of Conduct is a large hurdle for an oaf to overcome (unless their playing a Paladin of Freedom from Unearthed Arcana). But most importantly is the sheer amount of work it takes to be a paladin. Paladins are always traveling, questing, crusading, & risking their lives in order to help others. This level of devotion & effort is inconceivable to most oaves. Oaf Rating: 1

Rangers

Oaven rangers are often a study in contradiction. On one hand, rangers benefit from racial bonuses to Survival, infection resistance, & thrown weapons. Oaves gain from the class features of a ranger: Favored Enemy helps them against local foes, their spells use Wisdom, & Improved Two-Weapon Fighting is useful for wielding 2 clubs (especially with their Strength bonus). On the other hand, oaves have a poor Dexterity, penalties to Hide & Move Silently, & rangers often rely on Intelligence bonuses (which oaves often lack) for extra skill points. Also, the role of a guardian of the wilderness is not in tune with the oaven way of thinking, as they would rather ignore problems than deal with them proactively. Oaf Rating: 5

Rogues

Rogues are a sneaky lot, dodging trouble with agility & grace, hiding from danger & using their many skills to avoid trouble. None of these things are what oaves excel at. Oaves may be willing to lie, cheat & steal achieve their aims more easily, but their duplicity is rarely of a subtle nature. Their low Intelligence means that they have fewer skill points than rogues of equal levels, & their poor Dexterity means that many of a rogues class skills & features don’t work as well. Their high Constitution allows them more hit points than comparable rogues, they automatically get a lot more skill points than most other oaves, & their great Strength helps with extra sneak attack damage, but overall, oaven rogues are at a disadvantage. Oaf Rating: 3

Sorcerers

The life of the sorcerer appeals greatly to the oaven esthetic. Harnessing magical energy through sheer force of will, sorcerers can achieve mighty acts without breaking a sweat (& without cracking a book, as a wizard must). A task completed without any expended effort is a thing of wonder to an oaf, so few trundles get by without at least a few of these natural spellcasters. Oaves have a high Constitution, as well as resistance to poison & disease, so their sorcerers benefit from more hit points, a higher Fortitude saving throw & fewer crippling injuries than the average mage. Oaf Rating: 8

Wizards

No other class appeals less to oaven sensibilities than the wizard. Frail, erudite & studious, wizards use their Intelligence to gain new spells & skills. Oaves take an Intelligence penalty, limiting their potential to learn such magics & talents. Wizards cannot cast spells effectively while wearing armor, & must therefore depend on a high Dexterity to supplement their AC. Oaves also take a Dexterity penalty, so oaven wizards are notoriously easy to hit. Most unfortunate of all, however, is the reliance on spell books. Oaves are typically illiterate, so this need to haul around an actual book & study it frequently is an alien concept to them. Oaf Rating: 0

 

Prestige Classes

Oaven Firestarter (PrC)
Level	BAB	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Special	Spellcasting
1st	+0	+0	+0	+2	Kindle Flame	+1 level of spellcasting
2nd	+1	+0	+0	+3	Whittle Club	+1 level of spellcasting
3rd	+1	+1	+1	+3	Fire Affinity	+1 level of spellcasting
4th	+2	+1	+1	+4	Animal Companion	+1 level of spellcasting
5th	+2	+2	+2	+4	Lay on Hands	+1 level of spellcasting

 

Oaves don’t like to work, but they live far from civilization, so sometimes things must get done to ensure their continued survival. Tents must be built, food must be hunted & gathered, fires must be made & tended, injured must be treated, etc. This is level of necessary effort is repugnant to the oaves, which is why they have turned to magic to do their work for them. Their adepts assist with cantrips, while their clerics, druids & sorcerers help the trundles with more advanced magics. A few mages advance to greater skill, becoming spellcasters with a particular talent for providing for the tribe. These elite magicians are known among the oaves as Firestarters.

 

• Entry Requirements
• Race: Oaf
• Skills: Spellcraft 5 ranks
• Spells: Ability to cast 2^nd level spells (arcane or divine)
• Hit Die: d4
• Class Skills: Alchemy (Int), Concentration (Con), Craft (any) (Int), Diplomacy (Cha), Handle Animal (Cha), Heal (Wis), Intuit Direction (Wis), Knowledge (all skills taken individually) (Int), Profession (any) (Wis), Scry (Int), Spellcraft (Int), Survival (Wis)
• Skill Points per Level: 6 + Intelligence Modifier
• Class Features
• Weapon & Armor Proficiency: You gain no proficiency with any weapon or armor.
• Spellcasting: At each level, you gain new spells per day & an increase in caster level (& spells known, if applicable) as if you had also gained a level in a spellcasting class to which you belonged before adding the prestige class level. You do not, however, gain any other class feature a character of that class would have gained. If you had more than one spellcasting class before becoming a Firestarter, you must decide to which class to add each level for the purpose of determining spells per day, caster level & spells known.
• Kindle Flame (Su): You can create a tiny fire on the tip of your finger as a standard action. This flame burns out in 1d6 rounds, unless it ignites a flammable object or substance that it is put in contact with (50% chance in light/moderate winds, 25% chance in strong winds, 10% in severe winds). This minute fire can be used to light a candle, light a pipe, light a cigarette, ignite explosives, burn paper, or start a campfire. This fire can be generated 5 times per day + Constitution modifier.
• Whittle Club (Ex): At 2^nd level, you can craft serviceable clubs or greatclubs out of unworked wood, such as a large root, a medium branch, or a small trunk. These clubs are non-magical, & are not masterwork items. Crafting a club takes 10 minutes; crafting a greatclub takes 1 hour. You can make as many clubs as you have time & resources for. Resources by terrain are as follows:

Terrain	Clubs/Day	Greatclubs/Day
Cold	12	2
Temperate	36	6
Warm	48	8
Aquatic	12	2
Desert	--	--
Plains	24	4
Forest	60	10
Hill	36	6
Mountains	24	4
Marsh	48	8
Underground	--	--

• Fire Affinity (Su): At 3^rd level, you cast spells of the Fire Domain, as well as any spell that has [Fire] in the descriptor, at +1 caster level. This stacks with any caster level bonuses gained via other spellcasting classes.
• Animal Companion (Ex): At 4^th level, you gain an animal companion identical to the druid class feature. If you already have an animal companion, you gain a second one (provided that the combined hit dice for all of your animal companions does not exceed 4).
• Lay on Hands (Sp): At 5^th level, you can heal wounds by touch, like a paladin. Each day, you can cure a total number of hit points equal to your Constitution modifier times your class level. A firestarter cannot cure himself. You may choose to divide your curing among multiple recipients, & you don’t have to use it all at once. Laying on Hands is a standard action that provokes attacks of opportunity.

 

Trundler (PrC)
Level	BAB	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Special
1st	+1	+2	+0	+2	Hard Fall
2nd	+2	+3	+0	+3	Rotundity
3rd	+3	+3	+1	+3	Rolling Dervish

 

            Trundling has been a sport within oaven communities since time immemorial (mainly because oaves don’t keep good records), so it is natural that some oaves have become champion athletes, capable of incredible feats of rolling. These experts are known as Trundlers, & their rolling prowess is legendary. Able to roll far & fast, some can even turn their own bodies into living, spinning weapons.

 

• Entry Requirements
• Base Attack Bonus: +5
• Skills: Tumble 5 ranks
• Special: Weight must exceed 350 lbs
• Hit Die: d10
• Class Skills: Balance (Dex), Climb (Str), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Tumble (Dex)
• Skill Points per Level: 2 + Intelligence Modifier
• Class Features
• Weapon & Armor Proficiency: You gain no proficiency with any weapon or armor.
• Hard Fall (Ex): If you are ever forced to fall prone, you inflict 1d6 + your Strength modifier in falling damage on any one person adjacent to you as you fall, forcing them to make a Dexterity check (DC12) or fall prone themselves. You can elect to deliberately fall on someone as a move-equivalent action; however, doing so still leaves you lying prone afterward.
• Rotundity (Su): Starting at 2^nd level, your weight is considered 150% of its actual value for the purpose of calculating distance traveled while trundling.
• Rolling Dervish (Ex): At 3^rd level, your ability to trundle is honed to the point that you can attack others with your curled body. This is done by charging an enemy, diving into a curled ball-like shape, & rolling into them at high speed. This works similarly to a charge attack. You must move before your attack, not after. You must move at least 10’ in a straight line, with no backtracking. You may move up to double your speed. After rolling to your target, you make an unarmed slam attack (1d6 × the distance you traveled during the charge (in 5’ squares)). Using the momentum of your charge, you gain a +4 circumstance bonus to your attack roll. You do not take an AC penalty for attacking in this manner. You do, however, still provoke attacks of opportunity. This maneuver is a full-round action, so you do not get to attack again in this round, even if you have extra attacks. You stop after you attack your target. Also, if you strike successfully, your target must make a balance check (DC5 + 1 per point of damage taken by the slam attack) or be tripped.

 

Scavengist (AKA Scrounger, PrC)
Level	BAB	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Special
1st	+1	+0	+0	+0	Nature Sense
2nd	+2	+1	+1	+0	Purify Food & Drink
3rd	+3	+2	+2	+1	Detect Animals or Plants
4th	+4	+3	+3	+1	Track
5th	+5	+4	+4	+2	Create Food & Drink

 

Just like any other race, oaves need all of the basics of life: food, warmth, shelter. They’re just unwilling to work in order to obtain them. That’s where the Scavengists come in. Specialists skilled in the art of hunting, tracking, stealing, finding, & otherwise procuring items needed by themselves & others, these scroungers are viewed quite differently by oaves & non-oaves. An oaf sees a Scavengist as a hero, a person who obtains necessary supplies for the good of their trundle. Non-oaven people, however, often judge a scrounger to be a nuisance, “finding” & taking property, regardless of previous ownership. This dichotomy can lead to many complex adventures for the few intrepid Scavengists willing to face them.

 

• Entry Requirements
• Skills: Gather Information 6 ranks, Search 6 ranks, Spot 6 ranks
• Hit Die: d8
• Class Skills: Alchemy (Int), Appraise (Int), Climb (Str), Craft (any) (Int), Gather Information (Cha), Handle Animal (Cha), Hide (Dex), Knowledge (all skills taken individually) (Int), Listen (Wis), Move Silently (Dex), Profession (any) (Wis), Search (Int), Sense Motive (Wis), Spot (Wis), Survival (Wis), Swim (Str)
• Skill Points per Level: 4 + Intelligence Modifier
• Class Features
• Weapon & Armor Proficiency: You gain no proficiency with any weapon or armor.
• Nature Sense (Su): A Scavengist can identify plants & animals (their species & special traits) with perfect accuracy. He can tell whether water is safe to drink or dangerous (polluted, poisoned, or otherwise unfit for consumption).
• Purify Food & Drink (Sp): At 2^nd level, this ability functions exactly like the spell Purify Food & Drink, & is usable 5 times per day + 1 time per class level.
• Detect Animals or Plants (Sp): At 3^rd level, this ability functions exactly like the spell Detect Animals or Plants, & is usable 5 times per day + 1 time per class level.
• Track (Ex): At 4^th level, a Scavengist gains Track as a bonus feat.
• Create Food & Drink (Sp): At 5^th level, this ability functions exactly like the spell Create Food & Drink, & is usable once per day + 1 time per class level.

 

Boaster (AKA Storyteller, PrC)
Level	BAB	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Special
1st	+0	+0	+0	+2	Enthrall, Tallest Tale
2nd	+1	+0	+0	+3	Glint in the Eye
3rd	+1	+1	+1	+4	Mass Charm

 

            When the oaves gather around the Fire Circle, they exchange yarn, jokes, news & anecdotes, instructing the young, warning the old & entertaining all. Often, contests will spontaneously erupt between storytellers, who compete to see who the best teller of tales is. These boasting matches can become quite intense, with participants exchanging epic myths, mighty legends, side-splitting jokes, & incredible tales with a ferocity that borders on viciousness. These are the Boasters, & their storytelling abilities are as renowned as the stories themselves.

 

• Entry Requirements
• Skills: Bluff 8 ranks, Diplomacy 8 ranks
• Hit Die: d6
• Class Skills: Appraise (Int), Bluff (Cha), Craft (any) (Int), Diplomacy (Cha), Gather Information (Cha), Intimidate (Cha), Knowledge (all skills taken individually) (Int), Listen (Wis), Perform (Cha), Profession (any) (Wis), Search (Int), Sense Motive (Wis), Spot (Wis)
• Skill Points per Level: 4 + Intelligence Modifier
• Class Features
• Weapon & Armor Proficiency: You gain no proficiency with any weapon or armor.
• Enthrall (Sp): Once per day, this ability functions exactly like the spell Enthrall.
• Tallest Tale (Ex): Once per day, this ability allows you to add the number of successful Bluff checks you made that day to any one Diplomacy check.
• Glint in the Eye (Su): Once per day, at 2^nd level, this ability allows you to add an enhancement bonus to your Charisma score equal to your Wisdom bonus (if any, minimum 1) × your class level. This bonus lasts for 5 rounds.
• Mass Charm (Sp): Once per day, at 3^rd level, this ability functions exactly like the spell Mass Charm, except that the duration is 1 minute (10 rounds) per point of Charisma.

 

Feats

            With the exception of Lazy Bones, these feats can be taken by members of nearly any race. Oaves are not exceptional creatures in most respects, & the abilities that they possess can be used by others of a particular skill set, if they so desire. Many of these talents arise from a deficiency in some aspect of a character’s nature; this is intentional. Oaves are not creatures of balance, but they often live close to nature by circumstance, & so possess a bit of nature’s neutrality & equilibrium. As a race, they have, in their own way, learned to deal with their inherent flaws.

 

Awkward Grace [General]

• Despite your awkward body, you are sure of step.
• Prerequisite: Dexterity 6 or less
• Benefit: You get a +4 luck bonus to Balance, Move Silently, & Tumble checks.

Blockhead [General, Fighter]

• You have a battering ram for a skull.
• Prerequisite: Thick-Headed, Bonehead, Constitution 15+
• Benefit: Your head can now be used to inflict lethal damage, as well as to damage objects (1d6, ×2, bludgeoning).

Bonehead [General, Fighter]

• You’re head is an offensive weapon.
• Prerequisite: Thick-Headed, Constitution 15+
• Benefit: You can use your head to make slam attacks (1d6, ×2, bludgeoning), but only for subdual damage (no damage to objects).

Captivating Voice [General]

• Your voice has a hypnotic, mesmerizing quality, captivating all who listen.
• Prerequisite: Leadership, Charisma 15+
• Benefit: You get a +2 morale bonus to Diplomacy checks.
• Special: This feat requires that you be able to speak, that the listener can hear you, & that the listener can understand your language. This feat cannot be used through an interpreter, even if the interpreter has this feat as well.

Clumsy Grace [General]

• Despite your clumsy gait, you are very sure of step.
• Prerequisite: Awkward Grace, Ungainly Grace, Dexterity 6 or less
• Benefit: You get a +8 luck bonus to Balance, Move Silently, & Tumble checks.

Crippling Strike [General, Fighter]

• You can disable others with your attacks.
• Prerequisite: Power Attack, Sunder, Strength 13+
• Benefit: Before you strike an opponent, you can declare a crippling strike. If the attack is successful, your opponent must make a Fortitude check (DC5 + damage dealt) or be crippled (1d12 points Dexterity damage, can only take 5’ step) for a number of rounds equal to 10 + damage dealt. This attack cannot reduce a creature’s Dexterity to less than 1.
• Special: This attack can only be done once per encounter, & cannot be done to the same opponent twice in the same day.

Dull Wit [General]

• Your wits are duller than a wooden spoon.
• Prerequisite: Intelligence 6 or less
• Benefit: You have a +2 resistance bonus to resist enchantment & fear effects.
• Special: This feat must be taken at 1^st level; it cannot be gained later.

Foolish Luck [General]

• They say that fate watches out for fools, & you’re the proof.
• Prerequisite: Wisdom 6 or less
• Benefit: You get a +1 luck bonus to all saving throws.
• Special: This feat must be taken at 1^st level; it cannot be gained later.

Graceless Grace [General]

• Despite your total lack of grace, your stance is quite solid
• Prerequisite: Awkward Grace, Ungainly Grace, Clumsy Grace, Dexterity 6 or less
• Benefit: You cannot be tripped. Anything that would normally cause you to be tripped instead forces you to take a 5’ step in a direction of your choosing.

Idiot Savant [General]

• You have a rare talent for certain things, despite your foolishness.
• Prerequisite: Dull Wit, Intelligence 6 or less
• Benefit: You get a +4 insight bonus to any one skill that uses Wisdom as its key ability.
• Special: This feat cannot be taken more than once.
• Special: This feat cannot be taken in conjunction with Lazy Bones.

Lazy Bones [Racial]

• You are an exceptionally sedentary, languid creature, which necessitates a particularly crafty nature.
• Prerequisite: Oaf, Intelligence 10 or more
• Benefit: You get a +4 insight bonus to Bluff, Slight of Hand, or any Knowledge skill.
• Special: This feat can be taken more than once. Each time, the bonus applies to a different skill.
• Special: This feat cannot be taken in conjunction with Idiot Savant.

Lazy Spell [Metamagic]

• You are good at preparing magic, despite the slipshod manner in which you do it.
• Prerequisite: Spellcraft 5 ranks
• Benefit: Spell preparation takes half (½) of its normal time.
• Special: This feat has no use for spontaneous spellcasters.
• Special: This feat can be taken multiple times. However, taking this feat twice reduces the total preparation time down to 1/3^rd, taking it three times reduces the time down to ¼^th, taking it four times reduces the time down to 1/5^th, & so on.

Loutish Manners [General]

• You have an uncouth charm that causes others to like or believe you.
• Prerequisite: Charisma 6 or less
• Benefit: You get a +4 morale bonus to Bluff & Diplomacy checks.

Offensive Odor [General]

• You stink. A lot. Oh my god, you reek. Ewww.
• Prerequisite: Charisma 6 or less
• Benefit: Any humanoid, monstrous humanoid, or animal who approaches you become nauseated for 1d6 rounds (Fortitude save DC12 negates).
• Special: This feat is temporarily negated for 1d4+1 hours if you become immersed in water. This becomes 1d8+2 hours if you intentionally cleanse yourself or 1d12+3 hours if you use soap.

Rock Catch [General, Fighter]

• You can catch rocks & stones that have been thrown at you.
• Prerequisite: Powerful Build or Large Size, Strength 15+
• Benefit: You can catch rocks of small, medium & large size. Once per round, if you would normally be hit by a rock, you can make a Reflex save to catch a rock as a free action. The DC is 15 for a light rock (up to 20 lbs), 20 for a medium rock (up to 40 lbs), 25 for a heavy rock (up to 60 lbs), & 30 for a very heavy rock (up to 80 lbs). If the projectile has a magical bonus to attack, the DC increases by that amount. You must be ready for & aware of the attack in order to catch (not flatfooted).
• Note: This feat roughly emulates the Rock Catching special quality possessed by the giants (as per the Monster Manual).

Stone’s Throw [General, Fighter]

• You can throw rocks & stones as ranged weapons.
• Prerequisite: Powerful Build or Large Size, Strength 15+
• Benefit: You can hurl stones as ranged weapons up to 5 range increments. Your Strength determines the maximum weight, range increment, & damage dealt by the rock, as seen in the chart below:

Strength	Max Weight	Range Increment	Damage
15	5 lbs	20’	1d4+2
18	10 lbs	40’	1d6+3
21	20 lbs	60’	1d10+4
24	30 lbs	80’	1d12+5
27	40 lbs	100’	2d6+6
30	50 lbs	120’	2d8+7
33	60 lbs	140’	2d10+8
36	70 lbs	160’	2d12+9
39	80 lbs	180’	2d20+10

• Note: This feat roughly emulates the Rock Throwing special attack used by the giants (as per the Monster Manual).

Thick-Headed [General, Fighter]

• You have a thick head. Literally.
• Prerequisite: Constitution 15+
• Benefit: You get a +1 natural armor bonus.
• Special: This feat must be taken at 1^st level; it cannot be gained later.

Ungainly Grace [General]

• Despite your ungainly frame, your stance is solid.
• Prerequisite: Awkward Grace, Dexterity 6 or less
• Benefit: You get a +4 luck bonus to avoid being tripped.

 

Monster Manual Entry

Oaf

Medium Monstrous Humanoid

Hit Dice: 1d8+1 (5HP)

Initiative: -2

Speed: 30’ (6 squares)

Armor Class: 8 (-2 Dex), touch 8, flat-footed 8

Base Attack/Grapple: +1/+4

Attack: Greatclub +4 melee (1d10+3) or Rock +0 ranged (1d6+1)

Full Attack: Greatclub +4 melee (1d10+3) or Rock +0 ranged (1d6+1)

Space/Reach: 5’/5’

Special Attacks: --

Special Qualities: +2 to resist poison & disease, +2 to thrown weapons, Human Sight, Illiteracy, Monstrous Humanoid traits, Powerful Build

Saves: Fort +2, Ref -2, Will +1

Abilities: Str 17 (+3), Dex 6 (-2), Con 14 (+2), Int 6 (-2), Wis 12 (+1), Cha 8 (-1)

Skills: Climb +5, Handle Animal +2, Jump +5, Survival +6, Swim +4

Feats: Dull Wit

Environment: any non-mountain or non-aquatic

Organization: solitary, pair, gang (3-8) or trundle (15-50 plus 150% noncombatants)

Challenge Rating: 2

Treasure: no coins, ½ goods, ½ items

Alignment: usually Chaotic Neutral

Advancement: by character class

Level Adjustment: +2

 

Oaf Lore (Knowledge: Nature)

DC11: “This clumsy brute is an oaf. They’re like ogres, only lazier. Or maybe they’re like small giants…” This reveals all monstrous humanoid traits.

DC16: “Oaves are dumb & lazy. They may be very strong, but they believe that thinking is too much work.” This reveals all oaven racial traits.

DC21: “Although oaves are simple creatures that lack ambition, they can be useful allies if you motivate them enough. Oaves are often too playful & indolent for their own good.”

DC26: This result reveals basic information about the local trundles, the general rules of oaven games, & the existence of the oaven prestige classes.

 

Design Notes & Acknowledgements

My wife originally conceived of the idea of oaves, & I ran with the notion. We discussed it, & laid out the basic cultural framework (lazy & stupid). We decided on some of the habits & traditions (the Fire Circle, games, zeal to do nothing, etc). I then went to work, fleshing out every aspect of their lives in as much detail as I could stand.

Crunch-wise, the oaves are partially based on the Goliaths of the Races of Stone D&D supplement book. They are also based in part on the original Halflings (back when they were still known as Hobbits/Hin). Their sedentary, domestic lifestyle didn’t fit well with the life of an adventurer, but I’ve always thought that that sort of the point; as a race, they weren’t meant to be explorers & thrill seekers. Only the rare, exceptional members of their race ever tried to accomplish anything worthy of remembering, & because of that, they are labeled as aberrations (in the oddity sense, not the beholder sense).

I can’t thank my beautiful wife, Shanna, enough for all the help she gave me. She is great for advice, constructive criticism, & just all-around listening. She’s awesome; I highly recommend her to anyone who has an idea that needs judgment.

I’d also like to thank the people at Wizards of the Coast, specifically the guys who wrote the Races series of splatbooks. I think that they are just brilliant supplements. They’re probably the most essential (& most highly underrated) additions to the D&D game currently available.

Lastly, I must express my thanks to the Giant in the Playground, these forums, & you guys. I couldn’t have done this (or had a place to share my ideas) without you.

 

Bonus Material: Oaven Weapons

Oaven Club (Gush)

            The oaven club, known as a gush, looks like a greatclub, & for the most part it is one. However, there are a few key differences. These large bludgeoning tools are crude wooden truncheons, only superficially worked into a shape that accommodates a humanoid hand (or in this case, a monstrous humanoid hand). It is still quite obvious that they were once thick tree branches (or thin tree trunks), as the bark is usually only stripped from the handle/grip area. It is not uncommon (25% likely) for smaller offshoot branches to remain on the finished cudgel (add an additional 1d2 in piercing damage).

            Oaven clubs are generally wielded as one-handed by the oaves themselves. Due to their great size, though, characters without the Powerful Build trait must use them two-handed.

• Cost: 6GP
• Damage: 1d12
• Critical: 20/×2
• Range Increment: N/A
• Weight: 15lbs
• Type: Bludgeoning
• Craft DC: 10

 

Oaven Mace (Moch)

            The oaves have a version of the mace, known as a moch. It is somewhat similar to the oaven club, but tends to be better crafted, with fewer errant branches & other imperfections. There is also less remaining bark on the business end of these scepters. The most important difference in these weapons is their use of metal. Scrap iron spikes, nails, & strips are typically embedded into the sides of the mace, forming a crude (yet effective) morningstar. Few oaven maces exist, as metal is scarce in oaf lands (even the nearly worthless scrap used for these rods), & oaven clubs are easier to make.

            Like the oaven club, oaven maces are often wielded with one hand by the oaves. But due to their immense size, characters without the Powerful Build trait must use them as two-handed weapons.

• Cost: 12GP
• Damage: 2d6
• Critical: 20/×3
• Range Increment: N/A
• Weight: 20lbs
• Type: Bludgeoning & Piercing
• Craft DC: 12

 

Oaf Monster Class

            Now there are 2 ways to play an oaf. If you want to have an oaven PC (or an oaven NPC), you can still use the standard Level Adjustment. However, you can also ignore the LA, & instead use the oaf monster class to play as an oaf at 1^st level. To use the monster class, generate your character with the racial traits given below (rather than the standard oaven racial traits presented above), & then take levels in the oaf class as you would levels of other classes. For more information on monster classes, see the Monster Classes section of Savage Species, Races of Stone, Races of the Wild, or Races of Destiny.

 

Racial Traits at 1^st Level

• Starting Ability Score Adjustments: +2 Strength, -2 Dexterity, -4 Intelligence: Oaves are hulking & tough, but they are also dim-witted & clumsy.
• Oaf base land speed is 30 feet.
• Medium Size: As Medium creatures, oaves have no special bonuses or penalties due to their size. However, see the powerful build ability description below for more details.
• Human Sight: Unlike other monstrous humanoids, oaves lack darkvision, or even low-light vision. Instead, they have the same visual acuity as humans (which is to say, not much), & receive no special bonuses based on innate enhanced vision.
• Illiteracy: Oaves do not normally learn to read. Their culture deemphasizes education, & they have strictly oral histories & storytelling traditions. Therefore, oaf characters are by default illiterate. They must spend 2 skill points to gain the ability to read & write any language that they are able to speak.
• -2 to Hide & Move Silently checks: Oaves are naturally clumsy, & are quite inept at being stealthy.
• Automatic Language: Oavish
• Bonus Languages: Common, Giant, Dwarven, Troll
• Favored Class: Barbarian. A multi-classing oaf’s barbarian class does not count when determining whether he takes an experience point penalty (see the XP for Multi-Class Characters section, page 60 of the Player’s Handbook). The simple, indolent, largely illiterate life of the oaves produces many barbarians.

 

Class Skills

            The oaf’s class skills (& the key ability for each skill) are Climb (Str), Handle Animal (Cha), Heal (Wis), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Listen (Wis), Sense Motive (Wis), Spot (Wis), Survival (Wis), & Swim (Str).

 

Class Features

• Monstrous Humanoid: As monstrous humanoids, oaves are proficient with all simple weapons, but they have no proficiency with any armor or shield. They also have 8-sided Hit Dice, a base attack bonus equal to their total Hit Dice (like a fighter), good Reflex & Will saves, & skill points equal to (2 + their Intelligence modifier, minimum 1) per Hit Die, with quadruple skill points for the first Hit Die.
• Throwing Proficiency: At 2^nd level, an oaf gains a +2 to thrown weapons. Oaves have become quite adept at throwing objects, & can use them to attack with surprising accuracy.
• Fetid Adaptation: At 3^rd level, an oaf gains a +2 to resist poison & a +2 to resist disease. Oaves are naturally tough, & have become accustomed to squalid conditions, giving them a natural resistance to infection.
• Racial Skill Bonus: At 4^th level, an oaf gains a +2 racial bonus to Survival checks.
• Powerful Build: At 4^th level, the physical stature of an oaf lets him function in many ways as if he were one size category larger. Whenever an oaf is subject to a size modifier or special size modifier for an opposed check (such as during grapple checks, bull rush attempts, & trip attempts), the oaf is treat as one size larger if doing so is advantageous to him. An oaf is also considered to be one size larger when determining whether a creature’s special attacks based on size (such as improved grab or swallow whole) can affect him. An oaf can use weapons designed for a creature one size larger without penalty. However, his space & reach remain those of a creature of his actual size. The benefits of this racial trait stack with the effects of powers, abilities, & spells that change the subject’s size category.

 

Bonus Material: Half-Oaves

            Born of a rare union between oaves & humans, half-oaves are both shunned & pitied by their parent races. Humans find half-oaves to be as foolish, lazy & stupid as full-blooded oaves. For their part, the oaves see half-oaves as just like humans: brash, territorial, opportunistic, & overly-ambitious, none of which they find charming or endearing. Although a half-oaf has no true home, they tend to survive on the outskirts of either race’s settlements.

            A half-oaf may not be well liked among his parent races, but he is well-adapted to endure their scorn & pity. As hardy as an oaf & as adaptable as a human, half-oaves are naturally adept as making it through life on their own, without the support of a community.

 

Half-Oaf Racial Traits

• +2 Strength, -2 Intelligence
• Type: Humanoid
• Size: Medium
• Base Speed: 30’
• Human Sight: Half-oaves lack darkvision, or even low-light vision.
• Illiteracy: Half-oaves must spend 2 skill points to gain the ability to read & write any language that they are able to speak
• +2 bonus to Survival checks: Half-oaves are quite adept at living off the land, especially in the easiest manner possible
• +2 to resist poison & disease: Half-oaves are naturally tough, & have become accustomed to squalid conditions, giving them a natural resistance to infection
• Automatic Language: Oavish & Common
• Bonus Languages: Giant, Dwarven & Troll
• +4 skill points at 1^st level, +1 skill points at each additional level
• Oaf Blood (considered oaves for exclusively-oaven abilities & effects)

• Favored Class: Barbarian
• Level Adjustment: +0

Height & Weight Statistics

• Base Height, Male: 5’10”
• Base Height, Female: 5’6”
• Height Modifier: +2d6
• Base Weight, Male: 150 lbs
• Base Weight, Female: 175 lbs
• Weight Modifier: ×(1d8) lbs

Age Statistics

• Adult = 15 years old
• Middle Age = 40 years old
• Old = 60 years old
• Venerable = 80 years old
• Maximum Age = Venerable + 2d20 (82-100)
• Starting Age (Barbarian, Rogue & Sorcerer) = Adult + 1d4
• Starting Age (Bard, Fighter, Paladin & Ranger) = Adult + 1d6
• Starting Age (Cleric, Druid, Monk & Wizard) = Adult + 2d6

 

Bonus Material: Oaf Paragon Class

The Oaf Paragon
Level	BAB	Fort Save	Reflex Save	Will Save	Special
1st	+1	+2	+0	+0	Survivalist
2nd	+2	+3	+0	+0	Rage 1/day
3rd	+3	+3	+1	+1	Ability Boost (Con +2)

 

            The epitome of boorishness, the oaves are crude, dumb & lazy. But they are also strong, pleasant & resilient, with a quiet patience that impresses most people that are all too eager to write off these louts as mere cretins. The oaf paragon is the ultimate example of what it means to be an oaf. They are the laziest, the dumbest, the strongest & the toughest oaves in any community.

Alignment: Any.

Hit Die: d8.

Class Skills: Climb (Str), Concentration (Con), Craft (Int), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Profession (Wis), Survival (Wis), & Swim (Str).

Skill Points per Level: 2 + Intelligence Modifier.

 

Class Features

• Weapon & Armor Proficiency: An oaf paragon gains no proficiency with any weapon or armor.
• Survivalist (Ex): An oaf paragon’s racial bonuses Survival checks & to resist poison & disease increase to +4.
• Rage (Ex): At 2^nd level, an oaf paragon comes to terms with the raw power that courses through his veins. He can channel that energy into a wrathful frenzy once per day (or one additional time per day, if he already has a Rage ability). The effect of this ability is identical to the barbarian’s rage (see the Player’s Handbook, page 25). If an oaf paragon has improved rage abilities (such as the barbarian class features Greater Rage, Indomitable Will, Tireless Rage or Mighty Rage), those improvements apply to the rage ability granted by the oaf paragon class as well.
• Ability Boost (Ex): At 3^rd level, an oaf paragon’s Constitution score increases by 2 points.

 

Bonus Material: Oaves in 4^th Edition

by Shadow_Elf
“Nature’s attempt at the epitome of laziness, the Oaves are a race of clumsy & carefree foragers.”

• Average Height: 6’8” – 8’2”
• Average Weight: 200lbs. – 400lbs.

Ability Scores: +2 Strength, +2 Constitution

Size: Medium (see Oversized, below)

Speed: 6 Squares

Vision: Normal

 

Languages: Common, Oavish

Skill Bonus: Nature +4

Disease Resistance: +5 racial bonus to saving throws against poison

Adept Thrower: +2 racial bonus to attack and damage rolls when throwing heavy thrown weapons

Oversized: This creature may use equipment designed for creatures one size larger than it

Forager's Resilience: +2 to Fortitude defense

Play an Oaf if you want:

• To be lazy to a fault
• To throw big weapons
• To be a member of a race that favors the Fighter, Ranger and Warlock classes

 

Oavish Feats
Heroic Tier
Thickheaded [Oaf]

+2 to Will defense

Overpower [Oaf]
Prerequisites: Strength 15
When you hit an enemy with a melee basic attack, you deal additional damage equal to your Constitution Modifier

Paragon Tier
Improved Overpower [Oaf]
Prerequisites: Overpower, Strength 17
When you would deal bonus damage with Overpower, you may instead knock the opponent prone

Epic Tier
Master Overpower [Oaf]
Prerequisites: Improved Overpower, Strength 19
When you would deal bonus damage or knock and enemy prone with Improved Overpower, you can do both